Just curious: Why do SOME posters ask for help and then insult the responders.

[richard1rst]

If you are going to ask a question at least include all the information (not an edited and shortened version) and then don’t “dump” on the people who answer.

I and several others have answered questions asked, based on what information was given. Then, like clockwork, the OP responds with “No - actually what happened was” and they give additional and sometimes conflicting information that completely changed the story and, by extension, the answer we collectively would have given if we had known that to begin with.

I have noticed that when the answer they were given unsettles their preconceptions they turn catty and insulting. It seems that they were only looking for someone to commiserate with their problem not actually point out what they did wrong - or at least different from what the rest of us would have done.

In fairness it is not all of them. I and others have received big Thank Yous from some posters.

But there are quite a few who come on these boards to Kvetch and then insult the responders who disagree with them.

Reminds me of that old Monty Python sketch “I came here for an argument”

[eleanor*rigby]

---

@mansons2005 wrote:
Richard1rst - I too was unaware of the "score keeping" element of the boards until I was recently accused of posting merely "to up my post count" and that I was in some sort of race to "move into fourth place of Helpfulls" on the Payment board! Who tracks this stuff? And WHY? I have been on the boards since their inception and while vaguely aware of the badges and other grammar school nonsense, I was NOT aware that some apparently post simply to get "stars" instead of to assist other users with insightful information (and FACTS, not rumors) and possible solutions. Well, to each his/her own I suppose...........................I am neither condoning nor condemning, only in wonder that the practice actually exists.
I learned something here today - that makes it a good day.

---

@mansons2005 

I'd be pleased to give you my opinion on that!

I think "helpfuls" are used more in the fashion of "likes" on Facebook or other social media sites. I feel like people here mark a post as "helpful" as an indication of agreement--or more of a "popularity" contest; in fact, I'll admit I am guilty of that very practice!

I feel "solutions" are more of an indication of any poster's willingness and ability to actually provide the, well, "solution" to an OP's problem that they've posted on the discussion boards. They've taken the time to answer questions about shipping procedures, return policies, confusion over sales tax, certain technical issues, etc. There are often posters with a bazillion "helpfuls" given by like-minded individuals (which is fine, too) who post only on the "opinion-style" threads, but they aren't interested in providing "solutions" to members who come for help with a problem. To me, and I readily admit I may be the only one who feels this way, I have more appreciation for and confidence in a poster who has 300 "solutions" than a poster who has 1,500 "helpfuls" and no "solutions."

I think it's a similar perspective as the discussion on the importance of a seller's feedback or a buyer's "feedback left for others." But that's a whole nother thread! 

[mansons2005]

Yeah, that is how it all appears. I know nothing bout the Solution marker, as I have not posted any questions in years! I try my best to avoid posting an opinion, but when I feel compelled to I always try (to remember) to state that it is MY opinion or thought, not a fact.

I do use the Helpful feature as an indication that I believe that what the poster has written is correct and helpful (though I admit to occasionally marking a post as Helpful when it has made me laugh or I found it ironic, etc.), I hope that the OP will see it as an endorsement of that post.
I know nothing about Social Media (by choice) so have no way to quantify Helpfuls vs. Likes, though I have heard of the Likes battles that can rage on some platforms. I don't come here to socialize (though a bit of it naturally creeps in), I come to hopefully share some of the knowledge I have garnered over the past twenty years, and to assist those less experienced navigate this morass. And little about the boards aggravates me more than those who post an hysterical "OMG, Can you BELIEVE what they are doing, I'm going out of Business, They are all CROOKS, Its ILLEGAL to curb my free speech, etc" ad nauseum - particularly when the dross they are spreading around is not true or has not been proven. The SKY is FALLING screamers are the worst sort of poster in my opinion (and yeah, that is an opinion lol!). I would rather see a conflict of opinions, or the my "car" is bigger than your "car" type conflicts (I can ignore those) than to see possibly harmful misinformation spread around.

[monster-deals]

Lots of people aren't cut out for ebay.

Heck, lots of regular forum posters aren't either

[wyli-37]

I paid for a 10 minute argument and I only got 5! : )

[00pothole]

You personally now RELIEVED so many Ebay Members!!!!!!!!  Their reading of You has released their STRESS.  Nothing matches to release one's irritation  --- than to read how much irritation another has.  What another cannot put up with.   If only you could benefit their relief into what convert as free feedback for you.

[tunicaslot]

Just adding to the thread - but we have a good example upthread of why poster's get upset. One takes it off topic to express their dissatisfaction with something that is not part of the original poster's subject - just because. When most OP's come to a forum for help or to vent - usually the situation  they are upset about has just occurred and they have no experience dealing with the situation. It's not uncommon being upset that they leave out information that may be crucial for those answering to provide a reasonable solution. Most OPs will come back to a thread to view the answers as they need help and can then provide any information others may need to help them - but it's a big turn off to see people attacking the poster - and I have seen it happen multiple times and why I suggest using Facebook or Twitter for the problem.

Some are very comfortable here and feel anything goes even to the point of being rude and nasty which is never acceptable. If an OP is rude and nasty - you should never lower yourself - if an OP needs help - put yourself in their position with their upset before you make comments. If they get upset with your answers - pity them knowing you were trying to help and they are just hurting themselves by not listening.