feeling totally defeated

[tesa6240]

I am old and Ebay has been a great way for me to survive this economy.  I spent the entire weekend depressed and in tears.

The feedback situation has left me defeated. With the uptake of non payment, I put a payment within 24 hrs  unless other arrangements made. My lastest was from someone with no sales that said I demanded payment in 2 hours, not true.  I have purchased thousand of dollars in product, I have 750 items and tried so very hard almost everyday to post, my husband gets them out same day, I spend hours on descriptions.  My rating at 98.8% after 1 year.  and only 182 feed back out of 500+ sales. I feel so vulnerable to  have had 2 disatisfied  customers control my fate and then how much longer before another. 

Ebay did back me up lately on one customer that wanted to return, which gave me hope.

Alot of you with thousands of sales did you go though this? I worked in retail for years, but my job was not in jeopardy each time someone was displeased. Always trying to make the customer happy , but with this system you get blind sided!

When should I liquidate, as  this is very shakey ground and dont want to be holding this inventory with out recouping my investment.

[katzrul15]

@tesa6240 

There is some great advice to you as a Seller on this thread!

Granted - some comments are more direct, but why sugar-coat something that needs to be said?  You did post about being depressed and defeated.  And right above my post, about not wanting to be coddled.

You clearly wanted an outpouring of empathy for the plight.

What you received, is much more valuable - a deep dive look at the root cause(s) of some of your plight(s).

Heed some of this advice and it can change the trajectory of selling here.

Emotional time for you.  Take a few days away from this and come back to this thread with " fresh eyes". 

There are some real "nuggets" in this thread.  Use them well.

Good luck, all the best!

[maxine*j]

My father taught by story-telling, and this is a story he told me, and more than once:

A young woman was on her way to start a new life in a new town. Just outside the town, she saw an old man sitting in the shade of a tree beside the road.

"Kind sir," said she, "Can you tell me about the people in yonder town, what they are like, as I may settle there."

"Well," replied the old man, "What were the people like where you came from?"

"Good people," replied the young woman. "Generous, caring, peaceable, trustworthy."

"I am happy to tell you," said the old man, "That you will find people in yonder town just the same."

Now, as it happened, another young woman was on the road that same day, and encountered the same old man under the shade tree.

"Tell me," said she, "What people are like in yonder town, where I may settle."

"Well," replied the old man, "What were the people like where you came from?"

"Bad people," replied the young woman. "Stingy, cold, belligerent, deceitful."

"I am sorry to tell you," said the old man, "That you will find people in yonder town just the same."

.

[albertabrightalberta]

@maxine*j  - I love that! 

[fern*wood]

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@turquoisetulips wrote:

It was the unreasonable and uncalled for hostility I seen so many OP'S  receive  when they tried to ask for  some honest advice  in this forum  that finally got me to stop coming here as much,, rarely now . It  always seemed  there were more than a few responders on any given thread that simply started out angry  and were just looking for someone to verbally punch . Every piece of advice you received on this subject  could have been written in a polite way [ and most were]  without finger pointing , personal attacks and criticism  but yet some people  just didn't want to.  You were not asking to be coddled .  Any reasonable polite  adult  would rightfully  expect some more  mature  manners  in some of the replies you received . 

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This board is moderated.  If things are inappropriate or out of line , it is handled.

[maxine*j]

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@albertabrightalberta wrote:

@maxine*j  - I love that! 

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Thank you.  My father died 55 years ago, but I can still hear his voice telling such stories.  He came from the Ozarks and from people who had little formal education, so the "oral tradition" was still strong in him.  What a blessing for me!

-

[powell-memorabilia]

Honestly, I saw nothing hostile or offensive.  Let us remember that being offended is a choice.  Focus on the underlying message - not the delivery.

[simply-the-best-for-you]

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@turquoisetulips wrote:

It was the unreasonable and uncalled for hostility I seen so many OP'S  receive  when they tried to ask for  some honest advice  in this forum  that finally got me to stop coming here as much,, rarely now . It  always seemed  there were more than a few responders on any given thread that simply started out angry  and were just looking for someone to verbally punch . 

 If there had been such a reply, it would have been removed from the thread by the moderators.  There was no such reply.   Some people are more blunt & logical/factual than others.  Some don't use flowery language.  Some people are more sensitive than others.  The 2 don't mix well, but there was no hostility or rudeness that I saw, just people trying to help.  

I'm glad OP has learned some things, but just to point out, no one can make you feel stupid or any other way.  

[tesa6240]

Dear Rebel, I am still fighting too! I didnt realize the discussion board was another twitter, facebook where you could not vent, and get GOOD advise. You and others have know Idea who I am and my strenght. BOO WHO? What a great way to enchorage someone to keep fighting. Is this also how you deal with your customers? I was advised to just not respsond to people like you but your just so precious, I couldnt help myself.  One of many lessons learned now. 

[soh.maryl]

Most of the people who responded here were telling you that you cannot just make up your own terms when selling on eBay. 

[blingfling123]

@turquoisetulips 

"Every piece of advice you received on this subject  could have been written in a polite way  without finger pointing "

This is a forum about eBay, where financial transactions happen. Where people make their living. Where one wrong step can put your ability to make that living at risk.

An answer does not have to be polite or flowery, it just has to be correct. If people do not point fingers at where someone went wrong, people will make the same mistake again and will not learn from it and possibly lose their account over it. 

There are people on here that are blunt. They are not wrong, stating facts is not being rude, they are not immature, just blunt. A lot of these people are also some of the biggest sellers on eBay, have been here for decades and have more eBay knowledge in their little finger than the rest of us put together.

If people keep demanding that everyone is polite and flowery, blunt people will no longer answer and we lose that valuable knowledge. 

I will take a blunt answer from someone that knows what they are talking about any day. I may not like it, but I WILL learn from it. 

[downunder-61]

To be honest, the only hostility I see is from the OP - on more than one reply.

If you don't want adivce it is always best to just let us know it is a rant, rather than tearing down responders who are trying to give the advice you asked for.

You don't need to take the advice but arguing the facts of policy against your own TOS is counter productive.

[kaylybon0]

i have also noticed that there is no repercussion for people that dont pay for the items now. cant open a case for nonpayment on them  

[soh.maryl]

Not exactly sure what you're saying here.  But every seller has the option of cancelling a transaction on the 5th day if a buyer has not paid within four days.  The seller has 30 days to cancel, citing "buyer did not pay" as the reason.  

As for "repercussion", that buyer then gets a strike.  Two strikes in twelve months and most smart sellers have set their buyer requirements so that they do not have to deal with that buyer.

If you really think that you can't open a case for nonpayment, where do you get your information?