Unbalanced buyer won't stop messaging...

[sin-n-dex]

A buyer messaged me three times during the night to ask questions about a coin. I was asleep.

When I got up this morning he bought the coin. I replied to his questions (in case my answers would cause him to want to cancel).

Since then I've received four personal messages about his family and other stuff (and one of them was rather creepy). I'm not going to post here the things he said, it's already disrupted my calm at work this morning.

My reaction being the kind of personality I am is to ask him to stop messaging, but since I don't think he's very balanced that's probably not a good thing to do. Perhaps ignoring him is better. (I know if I sent a bunch of messages to someone and they never responded I would give up). It's like he's telling me his life's story and runs out of characters and sends another message.

I've given though to cancelling his order, but I'm not sure that's the best thing to do. I don't think he's going to give me trouble about his order, I just think he's going to annoy me while having the notion that we're penpals.

C.

[1tuna]

maybe you feel its tough to just ignore a buyer who can leave you a negative but I would just stop responding.

I have plenty of experience ignoring people who just want to chit chat one way

I think I woud have a hard time ignoring / deleting  a message that I  want to read

 I cant not look at a message but I can ignore the sender after I have read them

[bbravo65]

...someone needs "a shoulder to cry on"...???

...may be...may be not...

...just focus on the business side, not personal side...just don't read or respond to his messages anymore...

...sometimes curiosity leads us to an adventure...positive or negative we don't know...

...the odd vs. the usual...

[jayjaspersgarage]

I wouldn't give your return address if you mail the coin.  I have obscured or changed my return address hundreds of times over the years when a buyer lives within 400 miles of me.  I never put my return on the packing slip.

[katzrul15]

Some Buyers are just really needy.

Wouldn't respond and just mail the coin.

This buyer is evidently going to be in your IN box for a while!!

[1tuna]

mu buddy told me never put your home address on a buisness card

he sold sporting collectibles and was burgled a few times

[tdumonde2014]

Dear Buyer,

Sorry I couldn't contact you sooner, I was meeting with my Parole Officer. How long are they going to hold one little murder over me. Makes me so mad I could kill someone. Have to take my meds now, please keep in touch.

Sincerely, 

Inmate #4527865

[pikabo-icu]

@tdumonde2014 

Maybe the person is just lonely..

Doesn't understand boundaries and is of the belief buying something buys a friend for a while.

If that's the case, it's sad-  BUT if they're unhinged well, that's another story..

[forward-motion]

Oh wonder if this is  the same guy that said he was over the limit in questions and ebay blocked him from sending messages for the day. 

[sin-n-dex]

---

@jayjaspersgarage wrote:

I wouldn't give your return address if you mail the coin.  I have obscured or changed my return address hundreds of times over the years when a buyer lives within 400 miles of me.  I never put my return on the packing slip.

---

After 10 messages I replied that I was at work and too busy to read them. I haven't gotten any messages since.

As for the address, it's a PO Box in the city where I work, not where I live, and most of the time I work in my house because of COVID. I have to make a special effort to go and check my PO Box, so normally I only do that when I'm expecting packages.

C.

[sin-n-dex]

---

@1tuna wrote:

mu buddy told me never put your home address on a buisness card

he sold sporting collectibles and was burgled a few times

---

I used to be easier to track down a while back... but a burglary is difficult when you live with someone who never leaves the house and have pets that make a whole lot of noise.

I once again live with someone who never goes out (and I don't go out much either right now). So the house isn't empty very frequently. Plus my merchandise is stored at the B&M store and they have alarm systems there.

C.

[katzrul15]

Priceless!!

Man, where were you yesterday?  Really needed this for my buyer!!!

[sin-n-dex]

---

@pikabo-icu wrote:

@tdumonde2014 

Maybe the person is just lonely..

Doesn't understand boundaries and is of the belief buying something buys a friend for a while.

If that's the case, it's sad-  BUT if they're unhinged well, that's another story..

---

I said unhinged because of some of the disturbing choices of conversation (as if talking about that stuff was normal every day chatter). But I'd prefer not to share that in a public forum.

As a seller, I don't need to hear about people's family problems. There are forums on the internet where it's appropriate to go and share that kind of stuff. eBay is not one of them.

His first message was coin-related (even though I didn't respond), he was telling me a story about buying something that other people thought was worthless and it turned out to be very valuable. At that point I thought he just wanted someone to talk to (but I still didn't respond).

The second message was private family stuff and downright creepy. I called a male friend of mine to see what he thinks (as he's not weirded out that easily) and he said if he were selling coins on eBay and got a message like that, he'd be creeped out too.

C.

[sin-n-dex]

---

@forward-motion wrote:

Oh wonder if this is  the same guy that said he was over the limit in questions and ebay blocked him from sending messages for the day. 

---

My buyer actually bought something, I don't know that eBay limits messages if they've actually purchased.

If they do limit it (with their own programming), it's a high limit. I have gotten upwards of 20 messages in a day from a buyer (there's two buyers that did this). Their messages were all relevant to the transaction despite me giving repetitive replies to their questions, but it was still annoying. It's like "Dude, it's a $15 coin. Just wait for it to arrive."

C.

[sin-n-dex]

---

@katzrul15 wrote:

Priceless!!

Man, where were you yesterday?  Really needed this for my buyer!!!

---

I'm finding there's an increasing number of whackadoodles out there, and I've been adding a few people to my BBL every week. (Just so that I don't have to deal with them ever again.)

Most of my problem buyers respond to offers they get from me (which go out anonymously from my standpoint), and the BBL will stop them from receiving those offers which will stop them from bothering with me, unless of course they stumble on a listing by accident and try and buy it.

So far no one has ever messaged me to ask why they can't purchase from my store (unless they were in Azerbaijan or Romania, etc., in which case it's a location block).

C.