Can we edit a reply to feedback?

[boutique_369]

A buyer left me a bad feedback that was  undeserved & I left a knee jerk reply that I would like to now change or update. My father and also a close friend just passed away & I think I let the stress of my current situation spill over into my business. Is it possible to edit it? I having a hard time finding the feedback dashboard thing. Yes, I'm sort of a newish seller. Trying to be a power seller but have a lot to learn still. Thanks in advance for any help.

[boutique_369]

I got cut off but I meant to say then you’re a better person than I am at least I'm not rude for no reason.  The only thing it really reflects is I hate liars and scammers and im immature in my business.  Doesn’t make me the bad person. Just wait for your turn to get scammed and see how it feels. What reflects badly are the rude people here for no reason literally defending the scammers. Well im not learning anything else from here so I’ll be gone.

[bonjourami]

Try to keep in mind that prospective buyers see those responses,and it will probably chase them away. I know it would me.How sellers respond to bad feedback says more about them than it does their buyer.

[albertabrightalberta]

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@boutique_369 wrote:

I really don’t see how your snarky comments are any better than mine. At least I admit I’m trying to learn.

I doubt I’ll ever bother asking questions here again. 

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There's a difference between honest and accurate advice, snarkiness and coddling. 

Those of us who regularly post aren't here to be your friend, (generally) aren't here to make you feel better if your feelings are hurt and aren't going to coddle you when you are in the wrong. 

Telling you what you may not want to hear is way more helpful (in the long run) and will get you to the point of being a better seller than blindly agreeing with you and telling you that buyers are mean and scammers and so is ebay for allowing them to rip you off.

Telling you how to better respond to adversity will help you get to the point where you can shrug, block them and move on to the next good buyer.

Anyone who sells long enough will eventually get a problem buyer. There's no denying that some buyers are liars. Some are too high maintenance and should shop at B&M stores where they can see, touch, smell, etc. Other buyers are honest and found legitimate mistakes WE made in our listings. 

But in all cases, as a seller, you (and we) need to understand that our responses to those problems (whether true problems or perceived) reflect on us as sellers.

Sometimes we just need to hold our noses and accept the return and move on.

It's not personal that your errors were pointed out. You've just been shown how to better handle it next time.

[boutique_369]

I guess people have lost sight of the topic. I originally was asking how to revise or delete it because I regretted my emotional response.

a friend just pointed out he thinks your rudeness is because I stated I prayed for her. Which I don’t regret saying. If anyone needs a prayer it was her. She calls herself a derogatory word. Possibly spiritual bashing? 
I can handle polite constructive criticisms but those of you who are being rude it reflects way worse on you than me. I struggled with liars and scammers and maintaining my professional replies but you guys are rude to an honest someone trying to better themselves. 

it’s like that poor guy in the news I just read about who won jeopardy and social media losers were calling him hitler just for fun.

 I’m not saying that is to the same degree of course but it’s the same vein. Anyone who enjoys putting others down while they hide behind their computer, well that reflection is what you have to see in the mirror daily. I’m happy with my reflection.  

[bonjourami]

"Anyone who enjoys putting others down while they hide behind their computer, well that reflection is what you have to see in the mirror daily".  

Agreed.

[mcdonal-927]

I can assure you, my response had nothing to do with you saying you prayed for her.  Pray all you want, it's a lovely thing to do for people.  I have not lost sight of the topic, but I have given you the feedback that I think you need in order to do better next time.   Many of us have dealt with scammers, thieves, liars etc, but we don't allow that interaction to bleed into our professional appearance.  I can promise you I have been scammed, I've had attempted scams, I've had liars, I've had chargebacks that were fraudulent, I've had mean thoughts towards customers that have done these things, I've called them ugly names while relating the story to someone else in my circle.  I just didn't put in out in public.  Having a negative feedback occasionally is kind of expected at some point, but how we respond to that feedback is very telling.  

Many categories have issues, sure vintage clothes do, but so do baseball cards, comic books, coins, video games, sealed items, new with tag items, they all have issues with bad buyers.

It does not matter what the buyer did or what the messages were, you conduct yourself according to your own standards.   You just have to decide what your standards are and how that impacts your success.

You said "Anyone who enjoys putting others down while they hide behind their computer, well that reflection is what you have to see in the mirror daily.", isn't that kind of what you did with your replies to the negative feedbacks?  

It seems to me that you are looking for an excuse to justify your actions or discount the replies you have received on this message board.  You can't take the criticism given because people are rude or only being mean to you because you mentioned prayer.  Maturity or accountability is lacking here, I have no idea who you are, how old you are, what your life experiences have been, but I do know that from your responses it does not seem you have learned the lesson you need for this topic.  You could be a wonderful person, but leaving those kinds of responses will make a lot of people not give you the benefit of finding out.

It stinks to be wrong, it stinks to be called out for your actions, it's embarrassing, you want to defend it to save face, don't, just acknowledge that it was a bad move both times, and move forward knowing that actions you make public can bite you, keep it professional if your goal is to succeed here.   Don't let it stop you from participating, you can learn a lot here.