eBay

Please excuse my frankness, because I know this forum is mostly sellers. But I'm getting a strange vibe from a seller that I bought a kind of expensive piece from. He said that eBay will not pay out my money to him unless I confirm it's been shipped....

Does anyone know how to get eBay to step in when a seller charges adequate shipping costs with purchase and then there is additional charges at the delivery that must be paid or they return the package please?

$44 item. Offered $25 expecting a counter. Got a $38.20 counter. Offered $32 and stated if not, would take the $38.20. The seller raised the price of the item to $49 and countered at $43. Is this ethical?