I think I rolled over, over FB

[keziak]

Got an angry message saying my description was deceptive. I disagree but he made a pointed reference to my feedback and I refunded him. Now I think I probably just trained him to be aggressive over buyer's remorse and I should have offered the refund upon return. Now I feel bad about it. I don't read my FB but guess I'll have to check now in case he negs me anyway.

Have you ever second-guessed a refund?

[divwido]

A few years back the answers were simple, that's how it is with no debate.

Now it's a virtual mine field.  If I step here or say that-what will happen?

I miss the old way.

[fern*wood]

You are free to do as you wish, but with your feedback numbers and experience, I must admit I'm surprised by this choice.   I don't recall ever refunding out of feedback fear, if anything, it would make me double down on return for refund.    Even when I respond to a buyer discussing feedback, I ignore the subject. 

[doubledz-a2z]

Folks would be lying if they said they never did what you did.  Sometimes you have to pull the bandaid off in one quick swoop.   If you didn't lose too much I would add the buyer to my blocked bidder list and forget about it.   If you sell on ebay you have had one of those buyers.... probably more.    I google search their ebay ID and most of them are the type that give everything bad Yelp reviews.   It's in their genes.    Your time ahead by not going through the return process only to have cost you more by the time you cover shipping both ways.    If they leave you bad FB you Ebay might remove it but respond that you gave a courtesy full refund and move on.  Folks can see by your feedback that you provide great service on Ebay.    One Bad Apple....... 

[fern*wood]

After reading your post saying anyone that hasn't done this is lying, I'm going to hope you don't mean refund out of feedback fear, but in general.   I readily admit I've refunded without requiring a return on damaged items and a few that didn't make sense financially, but I do not believe I was lying about not refunding over feedback fear.  

I've even required the return when it didn't make financial sense if I felt threatened over something like feedback.

[myboardid]

I once gave in to a buyer who claimed damage and gave a partial refund.  It was years ago and I still regret doing it. 

I also once told a threatening buyer that I didn't give a hot darn what he gave me for feedback, if he didn't return the item I wasn't going to give him a refund.  He didn't return it and left me a neutral that didn't make any sense.  I survived it with no problems.

You really should read your feedback once in a while.  It can be interesting, informative and even fun!  It helps you know what issues buyers find important. 

[cs43ls]

I had a similar case last month. Buyer said the shirt  was not as described,( it was listed as very thin flannel and she said its brushed cotton, = same thing )  and unless I give her a 50% discount of the price and the shipping , she would leave less than perfect feedback,

I offered to take the top back, and paid for return shipping. She did not ship it back but tried to negotiate a different discount. Same answer again, please ship back , I want you to be 100% happy. Long story short, she left neutral FB, and I contacted Ebay  (first time ever ) and they wiped out the neutral  . Ebay agreed with me that this was clearly  FB extortion.

I think sometimes we are too afraid of ebays metrics . I will take my lumps if I make a mistake, but will fight any attempt to get bilked by the buyers.

[papermoneyforme]

I would never refund without a return for refund, then see what they do. I might still refund as you did, but at least they are on Ebay's radar.

By refunding as you did, you are feeding the Ebay Monster for other sellers and letting buyers get away with scams.

[custom-performance-products]

report the buyer.  buyers are not allowed to make threats regarding feedback.  period.  of course at this point it won't get your money back, but in the future if they specifically threaten your feedback ebay will back you and take down any unwarranted negative.

[keziak]

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@papermoneyforme wrote:

I would never refund without a return for refund, then see what they do. I might still refund as you did, but at least they are on Ebay's radar.

By refunding as you did, you are feeding the Ebay Monster for other sellers and letting buyers get away with scams.

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AFter I refunded I realized I felt the same way.   My initial feeling was it's a cost of doing business situation and requiring a return would probably just antagonize the guy. But then I asked myself what message was I sending when I responded politely disagreeing with his complaint but refunded anyway? Hmph.