eBay

tellmemama · ‎06-16-2019

So I sold a vintage doll outfit yesterday. The buyer is fairly new at 141 and her feedback left shows she has no idea how feedback or eBay really works. A few false/mistakenly left positives and a string of "how do you ship and does that include PO boxes?" left AS feedback.

She sent a few messages making offers on it and I replied I wasn't considering any offers right now. Then she said she wouldn't have the money until 7/1. I thought that was the end of it until she ended up buying and paying. She said she "borrowed" the money. Needless to say my hackles were already up.

Since yesterday I've gotten over 20 messages double checking that it was indeed vintage. I responded with the reasons why I'm certain it is and if she was still in doubt I would be happy to cancel for her. She would only say she wanted it if it was vintage. Clearly my 25 years of experience in my niche means nothing, nor does my feedback which she is free to review to confirm that I'm not in the habit of trying to defraud anyone.

I can already see what's on the horizon. She will receive it, claim it's fake, yada yada yada. So to all the posters who say "kill them with kindness" and "turn them into happy repeat customers with your great customer service skills", how would you proceed?

I'm one more message away from canceling and taking the hit.

Joe

tunicaslot · ‎06-17-2019

@esg-enterprises wrote:
You should have blocked her after the 7/1 thing, lol
But seriously I would cancel, buyer requested, of course, then block, my blocked bidders would fill a book.

And when Ebay sends that buyer an email saying we see you requested to cancel a transaction and they call Ebay and say - no I didn't - the seller then gets a defect if there is not a message confirming the buyer asked for that cancellation and you're probably flagged. Please don't give out this advice as small sellers will really be hurt if they do this.

*madison · ‎06-17-2019

how would you proceed?

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I would ship the item, and then if the transaction goes pear shaped, I wouldn't blame the buyer, I would blame myself for not blocking the buyer when I had the chance..

2015mhfashions · ‎06-17-2019

Repeated messages making offers when there is no Best Offer would have directed me straight to the BBL before the 20+ messages post sale, you just know this will not end well.

date-bait · ‎06-17-2019

If this was for a vintage Ginny outfit....run like the wind. There is a notorious Ginny buyer who is a serial emailer before and after purchase (like 15-20 messages in a row), nothing but complaints, regrets, problems, etc. This modus operandi is quite familiar.

Protect yourself...you've been around long enough to trust your gut on a potentially bad situation. Can't be worth the anxiety.

BTW ---- Tell Me Mama is the BEST song (but only the Christine Quaite version).

Great ID.

tellmemama · ‎06-17-2019

BTW ---- Tell Me Mama is the BEST song (but only the Christine Quaite version).

Great ID.

Thanks! But I beg to differ...

https://youtu.be/Z4BXRvrbhNU

Joe

tellmemama · ‎06-17-2019

I don't recall anyone here saying that "killing them with kindness" or "great customer service skills" will prevent fraud.

Then you must have missed those threads. There are plenty of posters who have suggested exactly these little nuggets of advice when a buyer becomes difficult. And I forgot the ever popular "some buyers need a little more hand holding than others".

You wanna hold my hand? You need to buy me dinner first.

Joe

ersatz_sobriquet · ‎06-17-2019

When you receive over 20 messages in one day, you are dealing with a very "special" person.

Ship it first class so when it comes back the shipping both ways won't be too big of a hit....

BTW I don't see anywhere in the Beatles lyrics anything about buying you dinner, smirk 🙂

scga912 · ‎06-17-2019

I'd cancel with Buyer Requested because she did say she only wanted it if it were vintage.

And if she asks, I'd say to her that it likely wasn't vintage enough and since she stated she only wanted vintage, you didn't want her to be disappointed as she had already repeatedly expressed concerns and that she didn't want it if it wasn't vintage.

- Suzanne -

*madison · ‎06-17-2019

Ship it first class so when it comes back the shipping both ways won't be too big of a hit....

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I just love your optimism.

ersatz_sobriquet · ‎06-17-2019

I am being optimistic he will get the same dress back that he sold 😛

lex-talon · ‎06-17-2019

I would say 20 messages is excessive, IMO. "Kill them with kindness", that will often backfire on a seller.

I'm one more message away from canceling and taking the hit.

If your account can take the hit, consider doing so.

esg-enterprises · ‎06-17-2019

Ebay really is in some peoples heads, they struck the fear of god in ya, lol

luckythewinner · ‎06-17-2019

@tellmemama wrote:
I don't recall anyone here saying that "killing them with kindness" or "great customer service skills" will prevent fraud.

Then you must have missed those threads. There are plenty of posters who have suggested exactly these little nuggets of advice when a buyer becomes difficult.

Difficult is different than fraudulent. I remember people making those suggestions about difficult buyers, but I don't recall them saying it will prevent fraud.

The only way to prevent a buyer from defrauding you is to not sell here.

tonf-21 · ‎06-17-2019

@tellmemama wrote:
So I sold a vintage doll outfit yesterday. The buyer is fairly new at 141 and her feedback left shows she has no idea how feedback or eBay really works. A few false/mistakenly left positives and a string of "how do you ship and does that include PO boxes?" left AS feedback.

She sent a few messages making offers on it and I replied I wasn't considering any offers right now. Then she said she wouldn't have the money until 7/1. I thought that was the end of it until she ended up buying and paying. She said she "borrowed" the money. Needless to say my hackles were already up.

Since yesterday I've gotten over 20 messages double checking that it was indeed vintage. I responded with the reasons why I'm certain it is and if she was still in doubt I would be happy to cancel for her. She would only say she wanted it if it was vintage. Clearly my 25 years of experience in my niche means nothing, nor does my feedback which she is free to review to confirm that I'm not in the habit of trying to defraud anyone.

I can already see what's on the horizon. She will receive it, claim it's fake, yada yada yada. So to all the posters who say "kill them with kindness" and "turn them into happy repeat customers with your great customer service skills", how would you proceed?

I'm one more message away from canceling and taking the hit.

Yes, and this may be against the rules to say but I can tell you 100% possibility you will have a problem if you ship.

(post message edit: I saw after reading a bit further you did ship)

Personally I wouldn't have gone past those 20 messages, I start getting nervous after the 2nd message and by the third I'm itching to cancel however I would also have looked into the possibility of whether this could be cancelled for reasons of buyer making unreasonable demands and if that were not possible I would've stated the item got lost / destroyed or something to that effect (out of stock is just as good), last but not least I would not relist that item for a good 90 days just to play it safe and keep the buyer from getting more fired up or having further ideas.

I am a nervous nelly seller, I get running fast and sometimes at the first subtle hint, because of that I may even jump the gun at times thou I try not to do that.

tonf-21 · ‎06-17-2019

@mam98031 wrote:
@tellmemama wrote:
Thanks for the advice. As tempting as it is, I am not one of those sellers who try to dodge a defect through a technicality like orchestrating a fake INR.   Even canceling with the proper OOS excuse doesn't sit well with me personally. But I completely understand sellers who choose to do so under similar circumstances.

I used to block anybody who made an offer since all of my listings clearly state there is no best offer option which to me shows they did not bother to read the description. And in the end it only narrows an already shallow buyer pool.   So it has to be pretty egregious for me to block someone. Especially when in this case, her money troubles made me think she was one of those buyers with eyes bigger than her pocketbook who would never be heard from again.  Sadly the real message storm didn't start until after she bought. You can be assured she has made membership to the "club" now.

I'm going to ship as promised and hope for the best. But expect the worst.

As long as you ship with tracking, creating what you are calling a "fake INR" will serve no purpose. This is one of the very few real seller protections we have on this site. If you have tracking that shows delivered or an attempted delivery, the seller can win an INR if one is filed.

I have no problem with protective measures, things sellers may or must do to keep themselves from being harmed, but to me retaliatory measures are never a good idea.

What was being spoken of here is to ship nothing, then when the buyer files INR simply issue the refund.

It's been a long time seller tactic of avoiding a defect.