Doll shipped in 36 hrs but sat in shipping facility over a week. Buyer is mad at ME.

[moneytospay]

I recently sold a vintage doll and shipped it within 36 hrs of the end of auction.   This morning I woke up to see a msg from Ebay that the buyer had filed a complaint that it hadn't arrived.  I got panicky but saw that eBay provided detailed tracking info on it.  Unfortunately, the shipper had taken it from my city to Nashville where it had been sitting for 9 days.  

I sent a msg to the buyer apologizing. I pointed out that once the shipper has a pkg, I can't control how fast that shipper gets it to a buyer.  I suggested she ask eBay if she's unable to see the same tracking info that I have.  I also told her I'd call USPS in Nashville to find out why it wasn't moving. I DID call USPS but got an automated system that told me the doll had just left the Nashville facility for California. The system said that no humans on their staff would know more than that.
I tried to copy and paste the tracking info into a msg for the buyer but eBay wouldn't allow it, so I saw that the buyer's phone number was with her information, so I thought I'd expedite the information to her by calling.
Instead of a "hello" she answered the phone saying "there's a pause".  I told her my name and said I am the seller for the doll, asking her if it was an okay time to call. She didn't say it was a bad time so I started to tell her what I'd found out via the call to USPS and the tracking info. 
She interrupted and asked in an angry tone "why are you calling me?"  I told her again that I wanted to relay the tracking info to her since she had filed a complaint. 
She said "you're not making any sense!  what are you talking about?!"

I was baffled by her response, and repeated that I just wanted to give her the tracking information. 
This time she yelled "I have a right to know....NO, I have an OBLIGATION to know what happened to my doll!!"
I said "I agree with you, which is why I called to TELL you what happened, since I'm assuming you can't see the tracking info" 
At that point she said her husband was looking at the tracking info then she insisted I was a scam and she would only deal with Ebay, so I said okay. I was ready to give up but she kept riddling me with questions and insults, so I finally said "I'm sorry. I thought you'd appreciate me calling but this call has gone terribly wrong so I'm going to hang up." She kept talking but I hung up. 

Right after that, I contacted the "expert seller" chat. Some guy who is an "Expert seller" told me that Ebay will  "force a refund" to the buyer and she'll get to keep the doll when it arrives. That is NOT an incentive for me to continue selling on ebay if that's true. Why would I be punished by not getting paid OR getting the doll back even though I shipped the doll on time?
I don't know what to think of that buyer. I've been thinking of sending another msg offering a refund to her if she'll return the doll when it arrives. She won the bidding by only 50 cents, so I'd rather get it back and sell it to the next highest bidder who I hope would be sane and appreciative.   What would you do?

[kathiec · Accepted solution]

Unfortunately you have few options here. Ebay is aware of the current deficiencies in USPS. So often if they can see by the tracking that a package is on the move but delayed, they'll hold off a few days after the buyer escalates before ruling in a 'not received' case. So hopefully the doll will arrive at its destination quickly since it's started moving again. That's the best-case scenario.

The worst-case scenario is that it continues to be delayed and eBay goes ahead and settles the case in the buyer's favor. If that happens, you should contact USPS immediately and see if you can recall the package. There's a cost to do that, however, so depending on the value of the doll it may not be cost-effective. If the doll is high-value, you may wish to see if you can recall the package now and go ahead an refund if it can be. Because if eBay refunds and the package is subsequently delivered to the buyer, the advice you got on the selling board is correct. Ebay has no way to force the buyer to either return the doll or repay you.

For the future, it's seldom a good idea to call a buyer. Keep all your communications through eBay, so there's a record of everything. People can be strange about being called, as you learned. And in this case, I think it just made the buyer madder, which is not conducive to a good resolution for you.

I hope it works out for you. If you have a chance, post again and let us know what happens.

[tree*fern]

@moneytospay   To add to @kathiec's excellent advice:

Make sure you respond to the refund case before the deadline. Keep it simple and short, and make sure you include the tracking #:  "Package on its way per the tracking [enter the tracking #]."

Now that she's filed for a refund, communicate only through the refund case. Do not message the buyer via Contact Buyer. 

In the case, do not ask eBay to "step in."  When they "step in," the buyer will be immediately refunded and your seller performance will be penalized. 

[moneytospay]

oh my, I did see the option to have eBay "step in" and, due to the buyer's behavior,  I wondered if that would be the next logical step. I'm glad you told me not to do it.  Do you happen to know whether buyers are able to see the same tracking info that I see?  It doesn't make sense for it to be seen only on my end, but not on the buyer's end.   

[tree*fern]

@moneytospay   Yes, buyers see the same tracking number with the item in their Purchase History list. It's a clickable link that then shows the tracking scans, exact same as what you see.

[moneytospay]

thank you, Kathie, I meant to hit "reply" not "accept as solution" because I don't want to stop getting replies. 
10 days at a shipping facility is bad, especially since it's clear that USPS knew the pkg was there, as the tracking shows they kept stamping it or processing it.  It's just such a disincentive to continue using eBay if they're willing to penalize me by refunding an impatient buyer AND letting her keep the purchase.

That also creates incentives for more buyers to complain every time there is a shipping delay, so they can get free stuff! 

thank you for the advice on not calling buyers.  I thought she couldn't see the tracking info for some reason, so I thought I could walk her through where to find it or else give her my email address so she could email me and I could reply by copying and pasting the tracking info.  We never got to any of that since I only got out the part about the pkg sitting in Nashville for 9 days when she blew up. 

I will mention that I also asked to get a call from Ebay tonight and got called quickly. The woman told me that eBay will NOT refund the buyer if the pkg is on the way and the tracking info shows that I mailed it on time.  So that's very different from what "Bryan A,  expert seller" told me in the chat room. 

What you've said is more in the middle of the two extremes and makes more sense. 

I don't suppose you know how to reach a USPS facility to recall a pkg?  It appears to have left Nashville, so I wish she'd complained a couple of days sooner while it was just sitting there. It might have been easier to get it back and sell it to the next bidder. Now it's got to go all the way from Nashville to California, which doesn't seem to bode well for me. 

[kathiec]

You can find information on USPS package intercept here: https://www.usps.com/manage/package-intercept.htm