When to call the police on abusive buyers?

[zmoz]

So, if you're a seller on ebay, chances are you've had to deal with a belligerent, incompetent buyer about something. You probably also know that ebay doesn't care at all about you as a seller, and will do nothing about this, even when you report them multiple times as an abusive buyer.

It's not uncommon for them to start throwing empty threats. Amazon and ebay are teaching them to be extremely stupid and rude, they don't understand ebay is different when you purchase from an individual person, and of course, individual terms are set differently in each listing. Usually being a belligerent buyer just means you get to keep something for free with absolutely no warnings from ebay. (We have ebay to thank for this) They won't enforce their communication guidelines, either.

I am very particular about this if it involves me missing an item or a payment. If a buyer steals an item from me in any way (even with ebay's blessing) I will report both to the postmaster general (mail fraud) and their local police department (theft). Unlikely that anything will be done about it, but at least they will get a warning from law enforcement and it will be on record if they keep it up.

My question is, when should I report threats from buyers to law enforcement? I know most of them are empty, but that does not make it OK. I currently have a buyer sending numerous ebay messages that say things like "I will find you", "I'm going to get you for this", "I will get my money", etc, etc. He keeps insisting that he "knows where I am". Not direct threats of physical harm but I can read between the lines and the intent is obvious if you read the 30+ nasty messages. Ebay has been made aware, ebay has chosen to do nothing. (For reference this buyer is demanding a refund on a non refundable item with no valid reason)

I don't want to waste the time of the police over frivolous things, but on the other hand, people should not get away with making stupid threats just because they are hiding behind a computer. Ebay's answer to this problem is only making it worse than it ever has been. Should I make a police report about stupid threats like this? Should I call their local PD or my local PD?

I'm not particularly asking about this specific buyer, but something similar comes up on a somewhat regular basis. Buyers on ebay seem to be mostly really stupid people, and I'm tired of them getting away with it with absolutely no repercussions.

[1tuna]

ebays stance on this is pretty clear,if you are threatened with physical violence then you should call the police.Its not a crime to know where someone lives,it would seem that someone is definitely enjoying getting your goat.I would just ignore your detractors for now,block the messages if they make you uncomfortable,if you try and take the high road and just ignore it,I think it will be less of an issue down the road

[zmoz]

---

@1tuna wrote:

block the messages if they make you uncomfortable,if you try and take the high road and just ignore it,I think it will be less of an issue down the road

---

Another flaw with ebay, there is no way to "block" messages from incompetent buyers. It would be an easy feature to add, but they won't.

Like I said, they weren't direct threats, but anybody who reads the complete 30+ messages I have would certainly take them that way. (Just the volume of messages alone is harassment) They are clearly intended to be threats. As I pointed out, I am not talking about one person, this seems to be an increasingly huge problem on ebay. I could go look in my messages and pull out at least 4 different threats from different people. It's not right to just ignore them and let them get away with nonsense like that, it's only rewarding bad behavior like ebay does. This nonsense is really getting out of control on ebay.

Let me be clear: These people do not "scare" me. That does not mean they should get away with threatening people and then ebay gives them free merchandise...

[mtgraves7984]

Block this buyer! I'm in shock that this comes up for you "on a somewhat regular basis"... as you can't block what you can't see, but BLOCK THIS BUYER!

I'm also surprised that "this buyer is demanding a refund on a non refundable item with no valid reason"... that's just silly. Today's eBay would allow the buyer to open a return... unless the buyer has done that  too often, too.

[picknparley]

Calling your local PD won't help until there's a more direct threat to you, but contacting the PD in the city where the abuser lives would likely have more affect. It could be the person is a troublemaker from the get-go and one more report may get them picked up. Hard to say. Be sure to be calm and nice about it, but include those coming-to-get-you threats.  If a week after you report them to their local PD and they're still contacting you, call the PD back and then send your abuser a note that their local cops have been notified. These people will shoot their mouth off until they think they've been caught. 

Take your problem back to ebay and go through the Security department.  No matter how empty the threats may sound anyone threatening to come after you is against ebay policy. 

Be smart - Be safe.

[zmoz]

---

@mtgraves7984 wrote:

Block this buyer! I'm in shock that this comes up for you "on a somewhat regular basis"... as you can't block what you can't see, but BLOCK THIS BUYER!

I'm also surprised that "this buyer is demanding a refund on a non refundable item with no valid reason"... that's just silly. Today's eBay would allow the buyer to open a return... unless the buyer has done that  too often, too.

---

Again, not just this buyer. Blocking them means nothing after they have already made a purchase. If you're surprised the buyer is demanding something stupid you must not sell much on ebay. It is very, very common.  Most likely, they will open a return, ebay will refund them, I will call ebay and yell, ebay will reverse the incorrect decision, and now the buyer gets a free item or free return they were not owed and ebay pays for the item twice. This happens ALL THE TIME.

[dtexley3]

---

@mtgraves7984 wrote:

Block this buyer! I'm in shock that this comes up for you "on a somewhat regular basis"... as you can't block what you can't see, but BLOCK THIS BUYER!

I'm also surprised that "this buyer is demanding a refund on a non refundable item with no valid reason"... that's just silly. Today's eBay would allow the buyer to open a return... unless the buyer has done that  too often, too.

---

Once you have completed a sale with a buyer, blocking them doesn't help until 60 or 90 days have passed, don't remember which.

At 30 harassing messages I would definitely contact your local PD about filing a harassment complaint, you might also consider having a cease-and-desist letter drawn up and sent to them as well.

[mtgraves7984]

No, I don't sell much on eBay (LOL), but I've been selling for years. Yes, a buyer 'demanding something stupid' I've seen plenty (LOL)… I thought you got threatening buyers  on the regular, and my heart ached for you!

And it's been years since I 'stress-tested' it, but the last 'something stupid' buyer I blocked stayed blocked... even though he had bought from me before the block.

You just taught me something! As did @dtexley3 . Thanks!

[aramintaca]

There is a way to block communications with a buyer. Follow these steps: First put the buyer on your blocked list. Then go to the item he purchased from you and delete it from your list. It will still show up in your PayPal account if you need to see the transaction again. He can only send you messages through the link to the item he bought from you. If he's blocked, once that link for the transaction is gone he won't be able to send you anymore messages. Unless he creates a new account. Then simply block the new account.

[zmoz]

---

@mtgraves7984 wrote:

I thought you got threatening buyers  on the regular, and my heart ached for you!

---

Yes, two this week. PayPal just closed the claim the other person made in my favor, which is a rarity. He just started threatening me directly through email after that. It is very, very common. Ebay is going downhill, I don't expect it to be around much longer.

If I simply ask them to stop contacting me, and they refuse, this is technically "cyber stalking" in my state. Even if they are just wishing me a happy day.

I would copy and paste some of the threats as an example but this may violate ebay rules and it may become a legal matter.

[zmoz]

---

@aramintaca wrote:
There is a way to block communications with a buyer. Follow these steps: First put the buyer on your blocked list. Then go to the item he purchased from you and delete it from your list. It will still show up in your PayPal account if you need to see the transaction again. He can only send you messages through the link to the item he bought from you. If he's blocked, once that link for the transaction is gone he won't be able to send you anymore messages. Unless he creates a new account. Then simply block the new account.

---

Where do I delete the item from my "list"? From all the places in my ebay account that list sales I don't see a "delete" option.

[1tuna]

................general reply.............

I get plenty of returns but I get very little flak over it and really do not wish to engage in a battle of wits with a buyer bent on returning something.Its a time honored tradition with many sellers to use this one " please return for a refund if you are unhappy with the item,it cuts right to the chase I think

having an item returned and refunding a buyer and making them whole will normally get them off your back.

[pburn]

---

@aramintaca wrote:
He can only send you messages through the link to the item he bought from you. 

---

Unfortunately, that's not correct. 

Another poster and I went through a whole big, "Block me and we'll test how this works" exercise, and we were disappointed to discover that, even though he blocked me, I was still able to contact him through his seller profile page by using the "Contact Seller" link. So, even if you block my member id, I can contact you via this page:

https://www.ebay.com/usr/aramintaca?_trksid=p2047675.l2559

By clicking on the "Contact" link:

In addition, as mentioned by another poster, a blocked buyer can continue to contact a seller for period of time concerning an existing transaction between the seller and buyer. 

[lightlily_arts]

Fortunately I haven't had many abusive or threatening buyers in the past 20 years. But from what I could see there wasn't any action taken as these buyers were still here after reporting them. Perhaps they received a warning but who knows.  Previously sellers could block buyers who had policy violations, but not anymore. This site has become so focused on buyers having a good buying experience at the expense of sellers.  That is why I am now slowly moving my products and selling other platforms where I have more control.  I pulled almost all high value items last year.

But just so you know that if someone threatens you online:  While some states don't have specific laws about online threats, all have laws against making criminal threats and bullying. Determining which online threats are illegal requires looking at the individual characteristics of each threat. If an online threat would rise to the same level as an in-person, or telephonic, criminal threat, then the online threat will likely be considered illegal.  In our state it could result in a misdemeanor  or felony charge. It depends on the credibility of threat or language used.

[oldwestgold]

Just ignore most threats. I have and doing nothing upsets the person more than engaging in drivel and banter.  There are a lot of internet armchair bullies out there. If they want to drive out and find me, they are more than welcome to as I don't call the police for various reasons. Just ignore them, delete messages you have received without reading them. If you have viable threats via eBay messaging system you can try to report them but from my experience, eBay does nothing, not even slap their hands so I quit reporting them a long time ago. Ignoring them will drive them crazy. Silence really is golden toward these types of people.  Just block them if there are potential bidders. End of drama. All businesses and walks of life have their fair share of them. Just a fact.