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Buyers steal products and make sellers pay the bill and leave nasty feedback

Im trying to understand how I got screwed out of a hundred dollars and the buyer kept my product and left me nasty feed back. ok I sell a very collectible #8 Large logo griswald frying pan. The seller decides they dont like it. they get there money back. Im stuck with no pan lost a hundred bucks and get bad feedback . can someone explain this **bleep** to me . I thought when a buyer gets money returned they are to return the product, I was literally ripped off and Im not happy with ebay 

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