Help! unhappy buyer, bad feedback, won't return item, accusing seller of bribery!

[avenier211]

Please help me with this one!  Buyer questions authenticity of an item, despite the lack of any authenticity guarantee. I never challenged the buyer on their claim and told them immediately that I would be happy to give them a full refund (all of $3), plus pay for return shipping.  I explained that I could not guarantee that the item was real quartz because I had not tested it, nor did I ever claim to have tested it.  The buyer then began messaging me about it actually being plastic, and complained that I didn't know what I was selling, ect... I never once argued with the buyer and from the first email, kept apologizing and telling them I would  happily refund them.  I asked the buyer to please request a return so that I could get the item back and pay for postage.  I did not hear from buyer, and reminded them to submit the request. The next day the buyer posted terrible feedback for me, stating I made false claims.  At this point, I just wanted to be done with the whole thing, so I refunded the buyer through Paypal.  I then asked them to please return the item, and they now are accusing me of harassment and for trying to pay them to change their feedback.  I have reported the whole thing to Ebay, but have not heard back. I do want the item, as it really is worth a lot more than the $3 the buyer paid for it.  

What can I do? Has this sort of thing happen to anyone else? I don't understand why the buyer wants to be so nasty, despite me trying to do everything I could to make them happy.

[slippinjimmy]

despite the lack of any authenticity guarantee.

It says "Rose Quartz" in the Title, buyers expect to get what they are promised and if you won't guarantee it then eBay will do so for you.

The price is irrelevant, it was an auction that you started at $3, it's not the winners fault that no one else bid. The fact you refunded doesn't make everything right especially when the buyer believes (right or wrong) that their feedback was totally accurate.

[extrememobility]

Maybe just me but i think the buyer wants you to say keep the item and you will refund him?  Seems to be a growing trend of this as most sellers do not want to pay for return shipping so they tell the buyer to keep the item to save the cost of shipping. just let it go!

[mam98031]

Buyer questions authenticity of an item, despite the lack of any authenticity guarantee.

Authenticity isn't just for brand named items.  Your listing said it was sterling silver necklace with dolphins and a rose quartz pendant.  Was it?

I never challenged the buyer on their claim and told them immediately that I would be happy to give them a full refund (all of $3), plus pay for return shipping.  I explained that I could not guarantee that the item was real quartz because I had not tested it, nor did I ever claim to have tested it. 

But you didn't say any of that in your listing, so it is reasonable that your buyer has issues with the purchase.  I don't think you omitted anything on purpose.  As sellers we just need to make sure our description covers the bases as best we can or we run into misunderstandings like this.

The buyer then began messaging me about it actually being plastic, and complained that I didn't know what I was selling, ect... I never once argued with the buyer and from the first email, kept apologizing and telling them I would  happily refund them. 

You didn't realize that it wasn't Rose Quartz but plastic?  How could you not notice that.  The difference between stone and plastic is pretty obvious most times.  Did you mean to say it was faux rose quartz and just forgot to put that in the listing.

I asked the buyer to please request a return so that I could get the item back and pay for postage.  I did not hear from buyer, and reminded them to submit the request.  The next day the buyer posted terrible feedback for me, stating I made false claims. 

I have to admit, that's a bit fishy.  I read the FB before you got it removed.  It does appear you have some description issues on this necklace.  But I do think this over-reaction to your request for return tells it's own tale too.

At this point, I just wanted to be done with the whole thing, so I refunded the buyer through Paypal.  I then asked them to please return the item, and they now are accusing me of harassment and for trying to pay them to change their feedback. 

You will never get it back now.  There is no incentive for them to do that.  They have the money and the item, so why bother.  There is nothing you can do to them.  I'm sorry.

[fashunu4eeuh]

Sorry for your trouble.

On eBay, it is not "Buyer beware" but seller beware. It doesn't matter that you didn't guarantee your item was authentic. On eBay, you must be sure of what you are selling. You do have to go the extra mile to verify your item before listing it. I cannot say, "hey this looks like a Chanel but i'm not sure it is or not, so buyer beware." I'm afraid in this instance the buyer had solid grounds for reacting the way he did. You are still a relatively new seller caught in the learning curve of eBay. Only list what you know to be facts. Never list anything you don't know for sure what it is. 

I looked at your listing and at the buyer's feedback left. The listing states the necklace is rose quartz. Period. It's called false advertising to list something as stone that might be plastic. There was nothing to report your buyer for to eBay. They were not in the wrong here. And if you already approached them about feedback revision before the customer was satisfied, you wasted that effort. Never send a revision request to an upset customer. From their perspective, you falsely advertised. Then you refunded without a return. Then you asked them to send the item back and requested a feedback revision? You went about this backwards. 

When something happens to upset a buyer, the first thing you have to do is take a deep breath. Do not jump on the emotional bandwagon and ride it to the horizon. It's business, not personal. You owed the buyer an apology and a sterling silver and rose quartz necklace. You messed up here. It is not enough to simply apologize and refund. In fact, if they returned it, that benefits you more than them if the necklace is valued at far greater than $3 as you say. Never refund and then expect to get your item back afterwards. 

One last thing--why are you starting your auctions off at such low prices?

[gew6463]

The buyer probably thought they had found a treasure others overlooked (it still happens occasionally). So they are acting on emotion out of disappointment. And of course, refunding them doesn't make them any less disappointed, even if you were trying to fix the situation. 

As mentioned, if you listed it in the title as 'rose quartz', then that is what the buyer expected. That it is authenic would be implied..otherwise, why list it as rose quartz, and not a 'fake rock' ect (I realize that may not be the exact term, but you get the general idea). Putting rose quartz in the title, pulled in a buyer looking for rose quartz. 

Feedback is the buyers opinion of how the transaction transpired; not how you fixed a mistake or misunderstanding with the transaction, or accepted a return/gave refund. Would I have given you a neg? No, but that is just me. The buyer is within their rights to do so. And once you have refunded the buyer, Ebay cannot force them to return the item, especially as they did not open a return case (unless I missed details here?). 

I'm sorry it turned out this way. Perhaps just consider it a lesson learned. 

[mam98031]

FYI  It may not have been just the Rose Quartz in question for the buyer.  It could have been that it was described as a sterling silver necklace.  That means the chain and the pendant would be made of sterling silver.  Keep in mind that if the pendant is made of different materials than the chain, you need to call that out loud and proud in the listing.  And if you don't know something, you need to describe what you don't know as well.

[robot-hands]

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@avenier211 wrote:

Please help me with this one!  Buyer questions authenticity of an item, despite the lack of any authenticity guarantee. I never challenged the buyer on their claim and told them immediately that I would be happy to give them a full refund (all of $3), plus pay for return shipping.  I explained that I could not guarantee that the item was real quartz because I had not tested it, nor did I ever claim to have tested it.  The buyer then began messaging me about it actually being plastic, and complained that I didn't know what I was selling, ect... I never once argued with the buyer and from the first email, kept apologizing and telling them I would  happily refund them.  I asked the buyer to please request a return so that I could get the item back and pay for postage.  I did not hear from buyer, and reminded them to submit the request. The next day the buyer posted terrible feedback for me, stating I made false claims.  At this point, I just wanted to be done with the whole thing, so I refunded the buyer through Paypal.  I then asked them to please return the item, and they now are accusing me of harassment and for trying to pay them to change their feedback.  I have reported the whole thing to Ebay, but have not heard back. I do want the item, as it really is worth a lot more than the $3 the buyer paid for it.  

What can I do? Has this sort of thing happen to anyone else? I don't understand why the buyer wants to be so nasty, despite me trying to do everything I could to make them happy.

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You did everything possible at every turn in a comically wrong fashion.

Your 3 bucks are gone forever, time to move on.

[juststuffisell]

Unfortunately for you, I think you just got played by your buyer. Read what fashunu4eeuh said....

Never give a refund until you have the item back unless you don't want the item back. Once you issue a refund, literally no buyer is going to send your item back. If you would have required the item back - I promise you, the buyer would have NOT sent it back. At this point, further contact with the buyer is pretty much harassing them. When you issued the refund, you basically closed out the transaction.

If you got the item back and buyer tagged you. You could have taken the piece to a jeweler/gemologist and gotten a little letter from them identifying the stone and metal of the necklace. That could have been used to remove any negative feedback that called the piece fake. Ideally, you would do this before hand or just call it a rosy colored stone and in your description call it possibly quartz, most likely some other cheap material kind of thing.

I looked at the item. It is marked sterling silver and does actually have the proper look to be sterling silver - I cannot say without proper testing. That is worth the 3 bucks all by itself as costume. As sterling, it is 10 times that (only because on eBay you can't get a ton for stuff like this without a designer name attached to it). Rose quartz is a relatively cheap stone. I looked at it, by the pictures it does appear to be a polished round low grade rose quartz (note how milky it is). Cheap. No different than when they put cheap low grade genuine amethyst stones in sterling settings. Again, without having the bit for testing, I can't tell you with absolute certainty, but it has the right look.

As noted, you have let your emotions control the situation rather than your reason. You are kind of stuck with this one unfortunately. In the future, especially with jewelry items which people like to borrow permanently on eBay, require the piece be returned. The buyer is nasty because they believe you lied to them about the piece or.... see my initial comment. Just gonna have to let it go.

You need to provide a very polite professional reply to the feedback. Some very crafty wordsmiths in the community that can help with that. I would recommend starting another thread for this asking for help on responding to feedback.

I want to point out:
https://www.ebay.com/itm/IRISH-Celtic-CLADDAGH-PENDANT-/153267861230
You gave this item away. I would recommend you work on your titles descriptions and item specifics. In addition, nothing wrong with turning something over, but if people new how much it weighed, you probably would have at least gotten spot gold price for it.

I can tell you from personal experience, your coach purses are going to eventually cause you headaches. Even if real, at some point, someone is going to raise a fuss. I quit selling these years ago. When I can pick one up, I do, but it is always something I offer up to my wife first and then extended family.

Good Luck!

[sweetpieces4you]

Hi, You should not have REFUNDED the buyer anything until you received your item by return mail !! $3.00 or $3,000,000 that BUYER should not have gotten any money !! I understand the hassle over a low cost ITEM and you just wanted to be done with it !! But if the item wasn't returned ( NO MONEY FOR YOU ) !!! Ebay should be able to take negative feedback off !! If not you can RESPOND to the feedback left for you I believe !! And I WOULD 😀 Very Professionally ( NOT ) !!! 😄

[luckythewinner · Accepted solution]

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@avenier211 wrote:

 I explained that I could not guarantee that the item was real quartz because I had not tested it, nor did I ever claim to have tested it. 

{snip}

I don't understand why the buyer wants to be so nasty, despite me trying to do everything I could to make them happy.

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You did not do "everything you could" to make him happy.

Doing everything you could would have meant being upfront in your listing beforehand - by not stating in three places (the title, the description, and the item specifics) that the item was "rose quartz" when you were not sure.

eBay requires your description to be accurate. That means if you did not  know it was rose quartz, then you should not have called it "rose quartz". So IMHO your listing was wrong and you are at fault. Does that mean your buyer is being reasonable? No, but IMHO that is just a symptom, not the cause.

That being said ...

There is nothing in eBay policy that requires a buyer to be happy just because you refunded and apologized after misleading him (and then trying to explain away why your listing was inaccurate).

[mlop-3568]

I do want the item, as it really is worth a lot more than the $3 the buyer paid for
it.
_

You refunded without getting it back, you're out of luck.

Also it's plastic, it's worth $3 or less

[castlemagicmemories]

Sorry this happened to you.  

You just can't list something as being whatever unless you are sure.  You are implying authenticity by doing so.  So listing as rose quartz says it is rose quartz.  

You don't get the item back if you refund first.  

A refund doesn't make the transaction magically right and buyers are allowed to express that in feedback.  

[albertabrightalberta]

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@juststuffisell wrote:
Unfortunately for you, I think you just got played by your buyer. Read what fashunu4eeuh said....



If you got the item back and buyer tagged you. You could have taken the piece to a jeweler/gemologist and gotten a little letter from them identifying the stone and metal of the necklace. That could have been used to remove any negative feedback that called the piece fake. Ideally, you would do this before hand or just call it a rosy colored stone and in your description call it possibly quartz, most likely some other cheap material kind of thing.

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Actually, ebay likely won't remove the feedback with "proof" of silver content. In ebay's eyes, it's the buyer's opinion and since @avenier211 really has no clue of authenticity, my guess is that the buyer is probably correct in her "opinion." 

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@juststuffisell wrote:
Unfortunately for you, I think you just got played by your buyer. Read what fashunu4eeuh said....


I can tell you from personal experience, your coach purses are going to eventually cause you headaches. Even if real, at some point, someone is going to raise a fuss. I quit selling these years ago. When I can pick one up, I do, but it is always something I offer up to my wife first and then extended family.

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As someone who posts on the fashion board, I can guarantee that the OP will have problems with the Coach bags. 

With one picture and minimal descriptions, that's a recipe for disaster. 

@avenier211  - ebay allows sellers to add (free of charge) 12 pictures to their listings. With highly faked brands and pre-owned items, those pictures are absolutely necessary for authentication purposes as well as for buyers to know what to expect in terms of damage, scuffs, rips, tears, odors, etc. 

I strongly recommend you end those listings and visit the fashion board or a purse forum so you can get help in preparing a good listing or you'll be back with more buyer issues. 

https://community.ebay.com/t5/Fashion/bd-p/fashion

[albertabrightalberta]

never mind.