eBay

cpht · ‎05-15-2024

Hello everyone, I am a newish seller here and unfortunately I've already had an issue arise with a buyer. It started out when she bought 3 of my items dirt cheap and then started complaining about the shipping cost. I did the best I could on it and I refunded her some money. Please understand I am selling vintage/antique dolls and I pack them extremely well so I tend to use oversize boxes hence the higher shipping cost. I thought I was done with her after her first purchase, but unfortunately I had listed another doll and she wound up winning that one as well. She immediately started complaining about the shipping cost and asking if I would refund her. I did just to appease her. I had the shipping at a set rate which was 30 dollars. That is the average rate for antique dolls and I thought I was being fair. I also have to factor in that I am supplying lots of bubble wrap and tape and that gets expensive quickly. So after I refunded her she started inundating me with messages about was I going to be listing more, when, etc. Now this is where I got really concerned, she then proceeded to message me and ask could she come in person to look at my dolls. It is my understanding that would violate Ebay's policies. Furthermore, I don't want to do my business that way. I want to give everyone a fair chance to bid and buy and I feel she is trying to get the upper hand and not have to do it like everyone else has to do. She is almost to the point of harassment/obsession. She has discovered she only lives 2 hours away from me and it's like she thinks she's hit the jackpot and that I"m a big pushover. I thought about blocking her from my auctions, but she will get a message when she tries to bid (and I know she will) that I'm not accepting bids from her. The type of person she is I know she will make a huge deal about it and I don't want to lose my good standing on Ebay. Not only do I sell, I purchase LOTS here and have for years. Your experience and advice would be much appreciated and I apologize for the long post. Thank you!

soh.maryl · ‎05-17-2024

The minute -- let me repeat that, the very minute -- that a buyer starts complaining about ANY part of a transaction that she has agreed to, like the shipping cost, I would tell her that I am sorry I can't comply with her request, I would cancel, refund and block. Depending on the reason you give for cancelling, you may have a defect, but, compared to the boiling cauldron you are about to enter, it's worth it. As for arranging to come and look at your things, that's a big fat NO.

movieman630 · ‎05-17-2024

You need to put your foot down with them. Explain that they have to agree to the shipping cost and terms when they bid and that you won't change them or refund them anymore outside normal combining of shipping multiple items if you can.

If they give you problems, block them. You don't have to deal with people you don't want to.

Most buyers will just buy something and accept the terms. Unfortunately there are some who think they can change the deal after they place the order. You're under no obligation to change the deal post purchase.

deltilogical · ‎05-17-2024

THIS 100% per soh.maryl:

"The minute -- let me repeat that, the very minute -- that a buyer starts complaining about ANY part of a transaction that she has agreed to, like the shipping cost, I would tell her that I am sorry I can't comply with her request, I would cancel, refund and block."

The time to negotiate terms if BEFORE a purchase. Bullies come in many forms. Even nice old ladies.

dm772012 · ‎05-17-2024

Block her immediately! Report her to ebay! Copy and paste whatever information you have from her wanting to drive to your home. That she wants to purchase off if ebay through you in person. She's using you and your generosity. She's reselling and making money off of your hard work. You are losing money selling to her. I've been a seller since 2012...I've had some buyers that pulled one on me several times. A lot of buyer have 3 or 4 accounts. You can look at tge location if they send you a question or offer. Location will be on the ebay email. I had Chinese buyer that drive me crazy with 3 different accounts. He was trying to take advantage of rare Ginger Jar. I don't sell out of USA. Many buyer have used 3rd party shippers. That's worked out ok. I had to block 3 of his accounts. Finally removed my listing. That was 8 or 9 months ago. Afraid to relist it. You don't owe this lady anything. Unfortunately, she had your shipping address. Please do a follow up with us.

certifiedcitynet · ‎05-17-2024

I would have blocked her after the first sign of her backbreaking ways. If she retaliates with a neg for prior purchases, call Ebay to have them remove it due to her attempt to conduct non-Ebay transactions, a blatant violation of Ebay's policies.

In my experience, buyers who harass you are never worth the effort. They invariably demand that they receive something for nothing and get coddled every step of the way.

Fortunately, in my field there are industry blacklists shared among dealers. We can warn each other in advance about such aforementioned backbreakers as well as thieves, weirdos, and other undesirables.

gurlcat · ‎05-17-2024

@soh.maryl wrote:
The minute -- let me repeat that, the very minute -- that a buyer starts complaining about ANY part of a transaction that she has agreed to, like the shipping cost, I would tell her that I am sorry I can't comply with her request, I would cancel, refund and block. Depending on the reason you give for cancelling, you may have a defect, but, compared to the boiling cauldron you are about to enter, it's worth it. As for arranging to come and look at your things, that's a big fat NO.

Agree but you forgot an important task: REPORT the buyer, citing the specific policies they violated (in this case it would be TWO: pushing for discounts after winning auctions, and requesting business outside eBay).

So many sellers seem to misunderstand what reporting buyers is for. It's not just a meager attempt to get them "in trouble" with eBay or stop them from doing things to other sellers -even if eBay does take any action against the buyer, the reporting seller probably won't know about it. But what it DOES do is serve as supporting documentation for *other considerations pertaining to the transaction(s) at hand. Namely, getting negative feedback removed, and justifying a cancellation. I have repeatedly been told by eBay employees (both phone and social media reps) that seeing the report on the buyer makes all the difference in helping the seller get out of the situation unscathed.

I don't know why there aren't more menu choice reasons for cancelling a sale. In a case where it's because the buyer is being sketchy (actually violating POLICIES, not just having low feedback or appearing to be in another country or anything like that) ... there really should be an option for cancelling for "buyer behavior" reasoning ... and choosing that option should automatically open a REPORT window, where you would then write what the buyer did, and the report would go on their record.

In leu of that option, I would 1. report the buyer, then 2. cancel due to "buyer requested." -If they're requesting an agreement that wasn't in the listing, then they're requesting to not purchase according to the listing. It's certainly closer to the truth than "out of stock." -The item ISN'T out of stock!

ittybitnot · ‎05-17-2024

and that I"m a big pushover....

@cpht

Though I know your initial reaction to this person was to be accommodating and provide good customer service, you actually showed them that you were indeed easy to "bully". They got what they wanted from you just like a four year old that stomps his feet and screams in the grocery store until his mommy lets him have the candy bar. Grown ups still find that technique successful as they determined at an early age it works! If you try to cease to be so accommodating you can indeed expect the tantrums, pressure, and demands to get worse. These people have likely had a lifetime to perfect their intimidation "skill". In the 24 years I sold here, I met plenty of them!

Good news is, you don't have to deal with them if you don't want to because they generally, psychologically speaking, will not "lighten up". Though I am a firm believer in "the product is YOURS to do with what you please", I would NOT recommend having this person visit to see your dolls, and have to engage in face to face "bargaining" with this sort of personality. Especially if you don't have the ability to remove them from the premises...LOL.

Buyers that try to negotiate on eBay "after the fact" can be reported right on the eBay message itself under the ACTION tab. You can report all sorts of inappropriate messages/requests there as well including "trying to take the sale off eBay."

As others have suggested, there is nothing wrong with you using the BLOCKED BUYER LIST. Keep a record of the name/address in case they try to play you with another ID. There is often a fine line between "asking" and "coercion". A simple 'thank you for your interest, but I am not able to accommodate your request' may go a long way.

Good luck to you, and may you have the best of sales!