Why did eBay automatically accept a return for me?

[shaocaholica]

I recently sold some camera gear and while I've sold many items on eBay before I've never had to deal with a return.  My listing was set to 'returns accepted - 14days, buyer pays shipping'.  However I was never notified of a return request only that the return was already underway.  The buyer tagged the return as 'defective' and I was given no opportunity to respond.  I contacted the buyer after the return had already started and determined that the buyer just simply did not like the item and wanted a return.  While annoying I'm fine with that but I want to be in control.  Is the only way to not have eBay automatically accept returns to set my listings to 'no returns accepted'?

[shaocaholica]

Thanks I get it.  There's no real options for a return policy on eBay.  Everyone has the same ebay return policy regardless of what is written or options selected in the listing form.  It's all a facade.  Power sellers do have some 'more' options but at the end of the day if you talk to eBay customer service even the big power seller companies still abide by the same rules as the smallest seller.

To eBay, a INAD and a remorse return are practically the same thing.  And that's fine, I'll accept that doing business on eBay.  But I'm just a small time seller so I'm not numb to 100s of returns.  It's still frustrating having thousands of dollars tied up for weeks due to a remorse return.