Colorful Language!

[alice.831]

How about sharing your favorite euphimisms, colloquialisms and malapropisms?

• Euphimism:

  a mild or indirect word or expression substituted for one considered to be too harsh or blunt when referring to something unpleasant or embarrassing: “downsizing” as a euphemism for cuts.

• Colloquialism: 

  a word or phrase that is not formal or literary, typically one used in ordinary or familiar conversation, often differing by region

• Malapropism: 

  the mistaken use of a word in place of a similar-sounding one, often with unintentionally amusing effect, as in, for example, “dance a flamingo” (instead of flamenco).

[loveyourimagination49]

How about you go first, it's been a long day.
Collo something like...

Pop-cola-soda ?

[pargran3]

Like one brick shy of a load?

or Happy as a pig in a mud puddle?

Radine

[pargran3]

One of my favorite malapropisms from this community.

Griper whiner extraordinary years ago was so fed up with buyers she was going to "drink myself to Bolivia"

Radine

[alice.831]

How about the one who was "going to blow a casket!"

[pargran3]

I forgot that one!

Radine

[alice.831]

The malaprop I hear often, and it cracks me up every time, is,

"Nip it in the butt."

And I knew a guy, very highly placed in his organization, who used to tell us he was going to

"watch you like a hog!"

Hummm, I didn't know hogs had such excellent eyesight. 😉

[alice.831]

We could add eggcorns to the mix:

a word or phrase that results from a mishearing or misinterpretation of another, an element of the original being substituted for one that sounds very similar or identical (e.g. tow the line instead of toe the line ).

And while the original saying seems to be 

"hard row to hoe"

you might be able to make a case for 

"hard road a ho"

but there is no case to be made for 

"hard road to hoe".

That would be a long and winding hoe job.

[loveyourimagination49]

Bird in the hand is worth more than 2 in a bush.

Probably said that wrong and don't know who to credit it to.

[alice.831]

"Don't sweat the petty stuff and don't pet the sweaty stuff." - George Carlin

[firebrand1224]

If you want to hear a lot of funnies-listen to the Israeli character Ziva on NCIS. The writers really did well with her. 

[hidy-hoo]

I can not tell a lie!  When I read the title of this thread, I was sure it would be about having a potty mouth!

[alice.831]

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@hidy-hoo wrote:

I can not tell a lie!  When I read the title of this thread, I was sure it would be about having a potty mouth!

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It's all open to interpretation . . . 

. . .  within commiunity guidelines, of course. 😉

[shirleys809304]

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@firebrand1224 wrote:

If you want to hear a lot of funnies-listen to the Israeli character Ziva on NCIS. The writers really did well with her. 

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Ziva was one of my favorites!  I would always forget to write down the things she said because they were so good.  She had a difficult time with American idioms, but it made funny material for the show.