Forwarding abusive messages to eBay admin
For 21 years I have had nothing less than 100% positive feedback but I recently sold a used iPod which had belonged to my late husband. Cosmetically it looked in good condition apart from usual slight dings from being in a car iPod dock. I thought I had reset it back to factory settings but for some reason, although it appeared to have reset, it hadn't deleted off all the content. I packaged it carefully, included a brand new leather case and sent it 1st class Tracked. The buyer got back to me after receiving it claiming that it had a gap between the front and the rear of the iPod and sent me photos to show this. I am fairly certain it was not like this when it was sent but can't prove it. He also found that the hard drive had not completely cleared. I have since cleared it using iTunes - not a difficult job even though I know very little about iPods. I sent him my response which asked if someone else could have had access to it as it had been inspected when I sent it off and it appeared to be in good condition cosmetically. However, I did say that as he wasn't satisfied I was happy to refund his money if he returned it to me. In response, he sent me the most abusive and vitriolic response claiming I was trying to scam him, that I was playing games with him, that I had sold him the item under false pretences, etc - really nasty. He has repeated these allegations on feedback which has reduced my feedback to 80% which has devastated me. I don't sell much on eBay but if someone were to complain, I would immediately offer a refund for the return of the item. This was his response to me offering him a refund
"Hi, nobody my end had access to the iPod. I find this insiniuation quite distasteful and a really disingenuous attempt to deflect responsibility. How dare you. Why would anyone want to prise the rear off anyway. Next you'll be blaming the courier. The box was not damaged either so good luck with that. And to send a copy to eBay to prove that you are not lying is again a disingenuous at best and sly at worst attempt to play the victim. What is clear is that you missed this or overlooked it. Don't play me for a fool. I'm too long in the tooth and can see through your games. The serial number on the rear does not match the serial number on the iPod itself. It has been replaced...badly. Disingenuously you took photos to hide the damage. Also you claim to have factory reset it, there are still 373 songs still on it, how is that factory reset? You claim to have done it twice, another fabrication, the hard drive is corrupt. You have tried to sell a non-working badly refurbished iPod for the maximum you thought you could get away. You will not be getting away with this."
What I want to know is how I report this to eBay admin - I know I can block him but want to have the unfair feedback removed. The gap he photographed was easily remedied by simply clicking the front and rear together and this is now firmly in place. A factory reset was carried out using iTunes and there is now 74gb available. Wasn't a difficult job - even for ignorant me. I know I can block him but he has affected my feedback so badly that I want to contest it. So both his claims are untrue. Any help would be gladly received as this has really upset me badly. I am 71 and have never knowingly sold anything on eBay that was faulty or not as I have described.
jennifrance
OP1 year agoThank you to everyone that helped. You were all supportive and gave a lot of good advice. I have replied to his negative and not very nice feedback with the simple message of 'I'm sorry you found cause to complain about the item. However, you were immediately offered a refund on return of the iPod, This was done within 4 days of your first contact. I am glad we managed to resolve the situation to your satisfaction.' As has been said, I can't get the negative feedback removed but hopefully, potential buyers will look at all my previous feedback and see that this has been the only negative one in 21 years. I have since had 2 buyers who have collected items and messaged to say they are absolutely delighted with their purchase, which has made me feel better. It's been an unpleasant experience but a learning curve. Thank you again for your sound advice.
mam98031
·1 year agoI think your response was good except for the 4 day thing. It reads like you took 4 days to refund after you got the item back. I know that likely incorrect because if you had taken that much time to refund, Ebay would have stepped in and forced the refund. But others might think you take too long to refund when an item is returned.
jennifrance
OP1 year agoIt was eBay itself that wouldn't authorise the refund until buyer had proved that he had returned the item. From his first contact with me to him receiving the refund was within 4 days. He had to show proof of postage to eBay and I had to confirm that I had received the item back for the refund to be authorised. This obviously took time. There was nothing I could do about that to make it quicker. Gone are the days where eBay used to just give them their money back without consulting with the seller. I was scammed a couple of times in the olden days so am pleased that they have done this.
mam98031
·1 year ago@jennifrance
It was eBay itself that wouldn't authorise the refund until buyer had proved that he had returned the item.
I think you are talking about AFTER a buyer opens a Return Request. But Ebay doesn't have to "authorize" a seller to refund. A seller can do that at any time that they want to. Before or after the return. Likely if done before the return, the buyer will never return the item, still seller choice.
From his first contact with me to him receiving the refund was within 4 days.
I said I understood what you were talking about, but others may not. Ebay allows seller 2 days after the receipt of the return to issue the refund. All I said was what you wrote in the response was a tad bit confusing.
He had to show proof of postage to eBay and I had to confirm that I had received the item back for the refund to be authorised. This obviously took time. There was nothing I could do about that to make it quicker.
I just think we are miscommunicating here. I didn't say you did anything wrong.
Gone are the days where eBay used to just give them their money back without consulting with the seller.
I'm not sure what this statement means. Ebay doesn't "consult[ing] with the seller" before refunding a buyer IF Ebay deems they need to step in. And Ebay gives various buyers their money back from sellers all the time. There are different reasons for this happening and it likely does not apply to your situation, but still it happens regularly.
I was scammed a couple of times in the olden days so am pleased that they have done this.
I'm not sure what rule you are referring to.
youn2240
·1 year agoif the buyer isn't sending a refund/ return request it's a non issue and just a goofy customer. If the customer is asking for a return he is probably scamming you and ebay will side with the buyer he's already saying the seruial numbers are different so hes probably going to ship you a different ipod back. basically there is nothing you can do about it. paying for items here is a mere suggestion and scammers get multiple scams before they get kicked.
powell-collectibles
·1 year agoI find nothing abusive about the buyers message. I think you are taking this all to personally – mistakes are made, maybe you made one or two. Maybe you didn’t – who knows? You don’t seem terribly confident in what you sent.
chapeau-noir
·1 year agoSorry, but that sounds like the sanewashing that has been going around. The buyer went right out of the box with accusations and sounded so absurd it was almost funny - fulminating about his little iPod and trying to be eloquent with all the sputtering, drawing strange conclusions and in general being a big baby.
Draw the line.
robbie31415
·1 year agoDifference between a buyer being an annoying cry baby, to them being abusive.
I've had many that are like this.
However, I don't see the actual ABUSIVE part of it.
Wanting to run to the admins about abusive behavior, you better be showing real threats, or something that's over the top.
Otherwise it should just be a block and move on.
chapeau-noir
·1 year agoI actually think his behaviour was immature to the point of humour. The OP did not.
You're deciding what somebody else should be thinking? Not your remit.
jennifrance
OP1 year agoThanks for you response - I am trying to keep a reasonable view on this. I think I was more shocked at the vitriol as I have never had a buyer respond in this way in all the 21 years I have been on eBay. The damage to the iPod was definitely not there when it was packaged and posted, he claimed it arrived like that. I only asked him if possibly someone else could have had access to the iPod - so not blaming him for it. It was really only when I read the last sentence 'You will not get away with this' that I felt unsettled and slightly threatened. But you have to bear in mind that I am a 71 year old female (reasonably intelligent and still working full time for the NHS) and have never had this reaction from a buyer before. My immediate response to his complaint was to apologise, to explain that that we had not been aware of the damage and offer him a refund on return of the iPod. The above was his response to that offer - which was out of order.
robbie31415
·1 year agoNo, I'm using eBays policy pages on what applies as abusive behavior.
I don't see the 'abusive' part in relation to eBays policy.
The feedback doesn't appear to violate policy and is a reflection on the buyers feelings.
People have a tendency to throw words around like 'abuse' when they simply disagree with it.
fbusoni
·1 year agoThere you go again, citing your reading of the regulations as the standard by which all is measured and according to which all should conform, regardless of subjective experience. LMAO
Happy Thanksgiving! 😂
robbie31415
·1 year agoIt’s unfortunate that you’ve chosen sarcasm over substance in response to a reasoned reference to the regulations.
These standards exist precisely to provide an objective foundation for discussions that might otherwise devolve into anecdotal tangents or purely subjective interpretations.
If you have a substantive critique of the regulatory interpretation I provided, I’d welcome it.
Dismissing a logical framework without offering a meaningful counterargument, however, does little to advance the discussion.
Let’s aim for constructive engagement rather than reductive commentary.
If a seller believes that a buyer's messages violate eBay's policies, they can utilize eBay's internal reporting features to address the issue. eBay provides tools within the platform to report inappropriate messages or behavior, which are then reviewed by eBay's support team.
robbie31415
·1 year agoI think it's dumb to ever tell a buyer you are reporting them.
Reports should be silent, seems you threatened them with reports before they left feedback.
Best thing you can do if a buyer reports a problem is to say 'I'm sorry you are unhappy with it. I'll be glad to take it back'.
I mean that's a smallish item, return shipping isn't going to be crazy expensive.
But their negative feedback shows to me that you were confrontational, which is a bad move and a good way to get yourself negative feedback.
chapeau-noir
·1 year ago@jennifrance I'd first try to get it removed, though I don't think it qualifies. A response I would use is something like "I stand behind everything I sell, and offered a full refund on return of the iPod." And just leave it at that. Best to keep it simple, make no assumptions on buyer behaviour (he sounds like a real whiner - probably has meltdowns if his toast is burnt) - just your integrity and solution.
How to respond to feedback: https://www.ebay.co.uk/help/selling/leaving-feedback-buyers/viewing-responding-feedback-buyers?id=4103
mam98031
·1 year agoI really like your suggestion on a response. I would just add a few more words.
I stand behind everything I sell, and offered a full refund on return of the iPod, Buyer Declined.
mam98031
·1 year agoI'm not sure you can get that feedback removed. There doesn't appear to be anything in what they said that breaks any of the rules. Buyers are entitled to their opinions and your buyer certainly voiced theirs.
I would NOT suggest you respond to it unless you can do it in a polite and professional manner. No finger pointing, no name calling, nothing hostile. Otherwise you will be doing more damage to your feedback that what the buyer wrote.
I would however advise you go to the buyer's feedback page. View their feedback Left For Others. Do you see the buyer doing this a lot or on other sellers? If you do, that could be a reason to have yours removed, but the reason would be Feedback Abuse and that is what you would tell Ebay. Plus bring to Ebay's attention the emails they sent you and your responses.
luckythewinner
·1 year agoThe gap he photographed was easily remedied by simply clicking the front and rear together and this is now firmly in place. A factory reset was carried out using iTunes and there is now 74gb available. Wasn't a difficult job - even for ignorant me. I know I can block him but he has affected my feedback so badly that I want to contest it. So both his claims are untrue.
To be honest, his reply to you wasn't even close to being "the most abusive and vitriolic" based on my experience on this board. I would call it "angry and accusatory".
That aside ...
His feedback says there was a gap when he received it, and it was not factory cleared when he received. In your statement above, you seem to admit that both of his claims were true and had to be remedied afterward. In your post above, you also admit you questioned him about whether someone else "had access to it" which could easily be interpreted as an accusation that someone at his end had pried the back off.
I see no grounds for eBay to remove the feedback, and you seem to have burnt your bridges with the buyer so I doubt he will revise it at this point.
jennifrance
OP1 year agoThanks for your response and you make some good points. However, the iPod was inspected by myself and my son before it was posted to the buyer and there was no damage apparent - especially in the place he showed in his photo - top right corner. When it was returned, it had either scrape marks or pry marks on the corner which weren't there when it was sent and you could not miss the gap as it was so apparent and would have been seen on our inspections. I have never accused him of damaging it. The reset did appear to have done a factory reset but when it came back there were still some music tracks and audiobooks on it - I have no idea why it deleted some things and not others. However, this took me less than 20 seconds to clear completely so not really a problem. As the buyer sells many items like this on eBay, I was surprised that he hadn't done this himself but hey ho, there is no accounting for people. My first response to his complaint was to apologise, ask him to return the item and I would issue a refund for him and send him a free postage label. He did return it and I did authorise a refund for him. However, his response was to post the above and to leave very negative and perjorative feedback on eBay which has reduced my feedback from my normal 100% to 80%.
fern*wood
·1 year agoI'm so sorry for the loss of your husband.
As others have mentioned never get into a back & forth with a buyer. From reading on the boards over the years I see one of the fastest ways to make a buyer really angry is to tell them you are going to report them. I would ignore all their messages and only reply return for a refund.
In the US, many times bad feedback is removed if you have a return and handle it properly.
jennifrance
OP1 year agoThanks - I never said I would report him, I simply said that I would authorise a refund for him if he could return the item and apologised for the inconvenience - though I did point out that I wouldn't have sent the iPod if the damage had been visible when I inspected it. He did return the iPod and he did get a refund but then sent that response and posted very negative feedback.
jerseyboymusic
·1 year ago@jennifrance
I'm REALLY sorry you are going through all this... especially with the loss of your husband.
I don't see anything listed or sold on this account you are posting from, so I assume this is a posting ID... I have no idea what you had in your listing.
I would make a last ditch effort to tell this buyer how distraught you are... especially since this belonged to your late husband. Appeal to their sense of humanity.
Also, on the negative feedback, you can reply to it saying something like "This iPod belonged to my late husband. I really don't know much about these and thought I had reset it, but he was the expert in these things". The feedback reply is for future buyers and may win you some compassion
jennifrance
OP1 year agoThank you all for the advice and the support. I have reported him for the abusive message but I'm not sure how to send the conversation through to eBay itself so they can see that his attack was unprovoked as the first message I sent was to ask him to return the iPod and I would authorize a refund for him. As it had been inspected before packaging and sending and there being no indication of any damage at that point, I obviously asked if there was anybody else who could have had access to the iPod. His photos show the gap between the front and rear of the item. If this was there when I sent it, it would have been very hard to miss so I don't know if he has damaged it himself (possibly accidentally). However, he has sent it back and he has had a refund and he has had an apology. I have responded to his abusive message pointing out that nothing in my response warranted the level of vitriol, sarcasm and hatred in his message and pointed out that I hadn't threatened to report him, just that I would pass my response on to eBay so that they had a clear view on what had happened and that he had been offered a refund. I have only ever had one other dissatisfied customer for a Walkman which had a defect (the lid for the battery case wouldn't open) but wouldn't have been spotted on inspection. I immediately offered him a refund if he returned the item. He was completely happy with this and appreciated me responding immediately.
I would like to give a short response to his abusive feedback along the lines of 'I'm sorry that my immediate response of a refund on return of the item has not been appreciated but that I am glad that we managed to sort things out to your satisfaction.' However, I can't find a way to respond to his feedback - does anyone know how this can be done?? I also would like to forward his response to someone at eBay but again, I can't find a way of doing this??
chapeau-noir
·1 year agoI would not leave that as a response - IMHO it sounds like a weak excuse and makes the seller look bad - people don't want to hear excuses, just what the seller did to remedy the situation. The reasoned response above I think is a better one.
jennifrance
OP1 year agoThanks - that makes a lot of sense. Do you know how to respond to his feedback as I can't find a way of doing it - told you I wasn't tech savvy.
mam98031
·1 year ago@jennifrance
I addressed this in my post just above your post.
I would NOT suggest you respond to it unless you can do it in a polite and professional manner. No finger pointing, no name calling, nothing hostile. Otherwise you will be doing more damage to your feedback that what the buyer wrote. Don't do harm to yourself just because you don't believe this guy or are upset with how they have treated you. I know it can be hard.
I would however advise you go to the buyer's feedback page. View their feedback Left For Others. Do you see the buyer doing this a lot or on other sellers? If you do, that could be a reason to have yours removed, but the reason would be Feedback Abuse and that is what you would tell Ebay. Plus bring to Ebay's attention the emails they sent you and your responses.
moretreasures4you
·1 year agoBefore you respond, you should see if you can get eBay to remove the feedback. Especially since you offered a refund that he denied. It might happen, but you have to try. Once they say no, then you can reply to his feedback saying that you had offered him a full refund if he would send it back.
If you don't know how to get the feedback removed, let me know.
jerseyboymusic
·1 year agoMy suggestion as a feedback reply was just a suggestion. I think it's truthful the opposite of weakness, but that's just me.
pickapaper
·1 year agoJust to reiterate, do not engage in conversation with the buyer. He is clearly a bully trying to belittle you and get something for nothing and anything you try to say now is only going to add fuel to his fire.
The only thing you need to say to him is something like "I'm sorry you are not happy with the IPod. Please file a return claim with eBay and you will be issued a label for the return of the item. When I receive the IPod back, I will issue you a refund". If he continues complaining/ranting, just repeat this. Say nothing else.
One of three things will probably happen. (1) You will not hear from him again. (2) He will return the IPod and you can issue him a refund. (3) He will return your IPod broken or will return something other than your IPod, for which you will still have to issue a refund, but that's a whole different issue.
I wish you luck.
jennifrance
OP1 year agoThanks for the good advise - I have never had a response like this in the 21 years of being on eBay. It shook me up quite a bit. My first response was to apologise but to explain that the damage had not been visible when the item was inspected before packing but that if he returned it I would authorise a refund for him. This was done but then I got that response from him and he posted a nasty review on eBay which has dropped my rating from my normal 100% to 80% which obviously damages my prospect of selling other stuff - not that I post much.
fbusoni
·1 year ago@jennifrance
It can be painful to be falsely accused of deceit... it's happened to every seller at least once.
You can report a buyer; information is here:
https://www.ebay.com/help/selling/leaving-feedback-buyers/disputing-feedback-received?id=4102
Unfortunately, the feedback will be difficult to remove. It reflects the buyer's experience and "opinion," according to eBay.
This is a cautionary tale about (a) the perils of selling electronics online, and (b) the need to ALWAYS remember that you, the seller, have no idea who the buyer is, or what is their motivation / mental condition.
Correspondence with malevolent / unstable individuals is quite risky.
It's always best to simply respond to messages with an apology for the inconvenience and a gentle suggestion to return the item for a complete refund. Short and sweet.
I would suggest that you reply to the feedback in a way that shows other buyers, who may want to review your feedback, that you have tried to offer a reasonable solution to the buyer's concerns.
"Buyer contacted me with his concerns, and I offered to pay for a return of the iPod and refund his money. Buyer responded with negative feedback."
Intelligent people will draw the appropriate conclusions.
Meantime, I looked at your listing and it says "Seller does not accept returns."
You have a right to not accept returns. But accepting returns is a far more customer-centric policy and instills confidence in buyers. regards
jennifrance
OP1 year agoThanks for the advice on not accepting returns - I think this is an automatic thing when you list something - I will certainly look out for it if I post anything else and change it for anything that I think might be problematic or which I haven't been able to test myself.
fbusoni
·1 year ago@jennifrance
The setting to offer paid returns is one that will apply to all your listings. At least that is how it works here in the USA.
Happy to answer any questions if you want to follow up.
vintagecraze50
·1 year agoI FORGOT to tell you this. Make sure you offer a free shipping label so they can send this back to prevent another major rant from them about having to pay for shipping. If they chose not as described I believe they get the label free. We set up all our listings with free return shipping so we do not have any problems with this. They just automatically get the label.
vintagecraze50
·1 year agoSome of these buyers on here buy these things and then resell them on here or elsewhere. They try to get a freebie so they make 100 percent profit. They mistakenly think that Ebay is a great place to steal merchandise this way. But buyers CANNOT bully a seller into giving them a partial, nor request a refund with NO RETURN of merchandise. If this buyer tries anything else REPORT this account on the report buyer section. Nobody wants this type of buyer buying from them on here.
vintagecraze50
·1 year agoWhat is completely hilarious to me in the buyers response is that they are basically saying that this is a piece of garbage that they do not want YET, THEY WILL NOT RETURN IT.. i guess they are 100 percent satisfied with that. LOL!!!!!!!
vintagecraze50
·1 year agoYour buyer is blowing hot steam at you to get the product for free or a greatly reduced price. DO NOT FALL FOR IT. Continue to offer full refund with Return of item. If they do not like it want it something wrong with it then return it. I have had a few of these pesky buyers on here and I understand your frustruation. Keep copies of the messages. Ebay will look at them. If said buyer has done this too many times on here they will consider blocking their account. Move on to your next GREAT CUSTOMER on here that will not be such a hassle.
mam98031
·1 year agoI'm very sorry about the loss of your husband. ðŸ˜
I always encourage sellers selling stuff like this to put the Serial Number in with your pics for the listings and in the description. If your buyer were to return the item, then you could tell if you got the exact phone you shipped to them back.
Now when a buyer reacts to your willingness to take a return and refund in the fashion they did, they are trying to bully you into a partial refund and no return of the phone. So don't play. Just respond Please return the item for refund. They send another nasty note, just send the short and sweet message again.
They will give up or file for a return. Most of the time they just disappear.
Now you can report these messages, but FIRST, save a copy of them in case they come in handy at a later date. Once you report the messages, Ebay sometimes completely removes them. You can report a message right in the Message system. If you have any trouble finding it, just ask.