Rude seller
Summary: In a discussion initiated by mamahoney about a 'Rude seller,' several participants engaged with various responses. soh.maryl and christworks were among the first to respond, sharing their thoughts and experiences on the subject. The thread included multiple interactions between different participants, including bonanza125, gurlcat, and others, responding to each other and discussing their perspectives. Additionally, gurlcat engaged in an ongoing dialogue involving several back-and-forth exchanges with mamahoney and other contributors. Throughout the discussion, there was a strong focus on discussing the behavior and experiences related to the seller mentioned in the original post.
Just had a run-in with an extremely rude seller, and I want to share this here, somewhat condensed, sorry it's still pretty long. I made an offer on a vintage magazine lot, which he accepted and eBay automatically paid immediately. The next day, I got a message from him, saying the listing was for only one out of the lot, and which one did I want? I double checked the listing, and the title clearly stated MAGAZINE LOT; seller description said the same. So I politely replied with that information, mentioned eBay had taken automatic payment when he accepted my offer, and said I would be leaving positive feedback when I received my purchase. Asked him to package securely with PLEASE DO NOT BEND and thanked him for his help on that. His reply: "I'm not sending you a **bleep** thing don't bother me anymore. Let's (sic) you want to pay the price $15 apiece." (Oddly, eBay bleeped out the word he used-like Hoover Dam, although they left it in his original message.)
I replied politely but firmly that accurate listing information is the seller's responsibility, and I would be cancelling the purchase and getting a refund. AND sharing my experience on this forum. His last message was that eBay wrote the title (no mention of his description) and admitted he didn't even check it before receiving offers. Said he doesn't care what I write about him, he's pulling his listings off eBay. And, "I'm done with you, babe." My final reply was even if eBay wrote the title, it's still his responsibility to check that it's accurate. I added that profanity, hateful and offensive language is strictly prohibited on eBay messages; couldn't resist adding (you got that, "babe"?)🤨
Needless to say, I'm glad he's leaving! In my 16+ years on eBay, I've run across only a very few bad apples, but this guy tops them all😵
grann-4629
·3 months ago@mamahoney based on your style of writing I would happily call you 'babe' with respect. Hope this nasty seller gets some soap to eat, from eBay of course.
Best of luck 😎
mamahoney
OP3 months agoAwww, thank you! I just didn't appreciate that awful man calling me "babe"; he meant it as disrespecting a woman. I did get my refund from eBay, with no cooperation from him. And I left negative feedback (his only other feedback is also negative), as a warning to other buyers😳
pickapaper
·5 months ago@mamahoney
Would you mind telling us just the name of the magazine? (For "research and development".)
gurlcat
·5 months ago@pickapaper She's not coming back to this thread, ever. 😆
soh.maryl
·3 months agoWell, actually, she did return, nearly three months later.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoYes, I did! Sorry to be so long, as I said before. I wanted to wait til I got my refund, which was completed April 3. And since then, life intervened, so here I am today. I appreciate all the other eBayers who wrote, (even the negative ones; I was able to reply and hopefully straighten out some misconceptions.) I'm rarely on this forum. A few years ago they changed the format, and I still get a bit confused.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoSurprise! I just did! Again, sorry it's been so long. I did get my refund from eBay; life has intervened and I just decided today to come back and reply to everyone.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoSorry it's been so long since I checked messages on this forum. I'm now going through messages and replying to those I haven't seen before. (I received my refund from eBay April 3.)
The magazine is Capper's Farmer; I have purchased several issues over the years for their covers by well-known artists. I love decorating with vintage ads and magazine covers.
couturehomecollection
·5 months agoThanks for sharing your unfortunate, but valuable experience, @mamahoney I usually write beforehand to a seller to clarify on lot type auctions as a plethora of sellers are intentionally misleading and mean to deceive! Most think the buyer simply will accept the underhanded trick, not bothering, as a couple of posters correctly observed, to bother with eBay's laborious and lengthy process to report and return.
How thoughtful of you to search for similar conversations before deciding to post in the forum. I wish others would think as carefully before responding to buyer posts in this forum. As a wise member has stated, you do indeed have every right to start a conversation of your choosing, but I might add, you may be certain that a chorus of less gracious members with perhaps too much time on their hands, will no doubt set about intentionally to blame, pick apart your post, criticize, judge you, and generally be argumentative. It's a dark cloud that hovers over this forum. 🌨
Nevertheless, thanks for speaking up and standing up to the shady seller as well as those who would stultify and misrepresent your words and intentions. More power⚡ to you! Cheers!
albertabrightalberta
·5 months agoAs much as you love to knock those who you believe attack posters, I personally agree with the OP that the seller was 100% WRONG to list a "lot" with the intention of selling the items separately. I believe the seller should own their error and send the lot as advertised and learn not to make that type of mistake again.
However I also believe that both parties (buyer and seller) didn't act like adults. They each had to have the last word, had to one-up the other and generally had to be "right."
gurlcat
·5 months ago@albertabrightalberta Not only did the OP reveal how they were childish; we don't know how much MORE childish they might have been in their messages, nor what the listing said besides "lot." I routinely see sellers misuse that word and I think it's simple ignorance rather than any kind of intentional deception. Not that they shouldn't be held accountable for ignorance either, but I think it's highly likely the OP didn't read the listing description, which explained that the $15 was for 1 magazine (out of the "lot") and the buyer should write to tell the seller which one they wanted.
Matter of fact, I'm not even fully convinced that the OP didn't know. I wouldn't be shocked if she knew but thought she could use the seller's misuse of "lot" along with bully tactics, to try to scare him into sending all the magazines. Note how when she "found out" the reality of the listing, rather than pick one magazine or request a cancellation, she doubled down on expecting the WHOLE lot. LOL not just that but telling him how to pack it and talking about feedback! @couturehomecollection does that really sound like innocent victimhood to you?
If so, maybe you need to read this oldie but goodie (link below). -What happens when someone makes a post sounding like they are dealing with an obsessed, crazy, abusive person ...... then that person enters the thread (second page, msg #25). This was possibly my biggest eye-opener to the concept of "Two sides to every story." I stopped assuming any post tells the whole truth from that day forward.
https://community.ebay.com/t5/Selling/My-eBay-psycho-buyer-sent-me-a-letter-I-have-to-sign-for/td-p/34250041
mamahoney
OP3 months agoHello, in going through the messages on this forum I haven't seen before, I came to this reply you wrote to albertabrightalberta, which has some of your reply I found today, plus more. Again, I'm surprised at your statements regarding my honesty. I read the message by the seller about the psycho buyer-that was a terrible situation-I was appalled at the actions of that unscrupulous buyer! But a totally different situation from my experience.
I certainly did not know there was a mistake until I got his first message and doublechecked the listing. At first, I simply presented the facts and proceeded with assuming he would come through after he saw his error; I usually do request protective packaging of paper items, and mention feedback; there was no intention of "bullying" or "doubling down". If he hadn't replied to my message with that profane vitriol, I would have simply asked him to cancel or taken just one magazine. But after that, I was certainly not going to reward him for breaking eBay messaging rules; I would never engage in any transaction with such an abusive person. He needed to be told his attitude was unacceptable. And be made aware of the consequences of negative feedback, as I informed him later. His only feedback from buyers are mine and one other buyer, both negative. Should stand as a warning to other buyers.
gurlcat
·3 months ago@mamahoney This may be the most hilarious WHOOSH I have ever seen. You're illustrating the exact reason why I linked that thread. You believe the buyer was the unscrupulous one just because the seller said so in their original post. EDIT: Actually who knows if you even clicked on it and read any of it, considering the title referred to a "psycho buyer." 😆
You definitely did not read what the buyer had to say (and show) once they learned of the post and entered the thread.
Jeez I even made it easy for you to skip past a lot of reading, by providing the page and message number, when the buyer entered the thread.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoYes, you're right that I did not read the buyer's messages; I didn't find those, didn't know there was any. As I mentioned before replying to another message, I'm sometimes a bit confused navigating these forums. I will try to find the buyer's message and get back to you with my thoughts on that situation.
I'm sorry you doubt that I even clicked on that thread. I'm an honest eBayer, but since I can't convince you that I was not trying to rip off that seller, I will simply accept that and wish you well. I take comfort in the knowledge that I am not what you think. If you knew me, you would see clearly that I am not untruthful nor unethical.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoHi, I finally figured out how to better navigate this forum (some years ago eBay changed the format and I've been a bit confused since then.) SO, I did as you suggested-just finished the Psycho Buyer thread-all 168 posts and replies! Once I started, I HAD to keep going-what a saga! From the evidence, I now see clearly that the seller, not the buyer, was at fault. Happy ending for the buyers in the very last message, glad I made it through to #168!
Thank you for directing me there, and again when I failed to see the buyer's message. I would have appreciated a kinder, less caustic tone along with your good advice, but we're all different and communicate differently; no harm done-after my 7+ decades of this life, and raising our 5 wonderful children with my sometimes-moody husband, I don't suffer from hurt feelings easily. Thanks again for your valuable input; I appreciate all the eBayers who posted in this conversation. (My reply to you from yesterday follows this one-I wasn't sure how to add today's. Still learning......)
mamahoney
OP3 months agoSorry I've been so long in checking replies on this forum. I'm now replying to messages I haven't seen before. (I did get my refund from eBay on April 3). Thank you for your message in reply to couturehomecollection. I do disagree with your last paragraph. I believe in all my replies to the seller, that I WAS "acting like an adult." His rude, profane, hostile messages should not have gone unanswered. I did not reply in kind, simply set forth the facts (which he didn't like, but they were the truth.) I didn't feel any need to have "the last word, or one-up him, or be right". I feel I handled his barrage of vitriol in the best way possible.
grann-4629
·3 months agoAgree with the removal of the word 'lot' in the title.
I don't know how I would word it, but I have looked at similar listings that include a drop down list of each magazine in the lot and the buyer can select as many as they want, with each showing an individual price when selected. The ones that are sold are greyed out on the list ... not sure if the seller has to do this (horror) or if it's automatically done by eBay.
When checking out, the buyer sees the total for every magazine s/he has selected.
Simple.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoThank you so much for your kind reply! It's a breath of fresh air after seeing some "less gracious" replies. I just today, June 5, returned to this conversation after getting my refund from eBay on April 3. I wanted to reply to messages I haven't seen before. Thanks again for your support!
pastimpressions
·5 months ago@gurlcat wrote: " I bet a hundred doll hairs"
I am trying to imagine the Universe in which that is a form of currency/trade/tender.
How do you count & store them?
Are they sold by the hair or by net weight?
If by net weight, is it Standard or Metric?
So many questions. 🤔
gurlcat
·5 months ago@pastimpressions Actually the biggest factor is length. Although the standard doll hair is 4.3 inches long (it's illegal to state doll hair lengths in metric), and those are each worth 0.0039 of a unicorn horn, if you can find the rare foot-long doll hair it's worth an entire dragon -a trained one even.
And no, Cabbage Patch yarn hair isn't worth anything so don't go trying to swindle buyers with that crud, in fact that's a good way to get yourself zonked. They based a whole episode of Law and Order on one foolish seller's gamble with yarn hair.
pastimpressions
·5 months agoYou ARE the heir/hair apparent. You are truly without peer🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I needed a big laugh after the generous offer I received late last night of 99 & 2/10th% off my asking price.
Thanks for giving it to me. As I read your line, I relived the "happy housewife handy" tv commercial skit with Ralph & Ed cutting hairs with the gadget. Classic.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoThank you gurlcat and past impressions, for these hilarious messages😂 Nice to get a good laugh in this difficult conversation.
grann-4629
·3 months agoit's illegal to state doll hair lengths in metric ...
Only because you don't know how to do it 😎
We had that 'Gimli Glider' incident here a number of years ago, about 1 km south of my son's farm. A large commercial jetliner had to make an emergency non-powered landing on a drag-strip that was being used at the time. There was a mix-up with Metric/Imperial conversions and the plane ran out of gas before making it to Winnipeg ... about 70 miles out, I think. Check it out on Youtube.
btw, and more importantly, I WANT ONE of those DRAGONS for my kitty to play with. She gets bored when I go out.
gurlcat
·5 months agoWhy do I have the funny feeling you're not revealing everything here? Like even if the word "lot" was in the title and description, I bet a hundred doll hairs that the description also talked about letting the seller know which magazine you want .... but you simply didn't read the description before buying.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoSorry it's been so long since I returned to this conversation, after getting my refund from eBay. As I said in my original message here, his description repeated what the title said about the "magazine lot", and nothing was said about individual magazines. That's why I double-checked the listing before I replied to him, in case I HAD missed something. I've been an eBay member for 16 years; I'm honest and ethical in my eBay dealings. I have no idea why you think I would come on here and lie about the listing and description; I'm sorry you think that.
grann-4629
·3 months agoI bet a hundred doll hairs ...
I hope they are not all from the same doll ... you may be setting a new fashion craze 😎
le-5262
·5 months agoI can see why you'd be taken aback by that exchange...
mamahoney
OP3 months agoYes, especially considering I've been an eBay buyer for over 16 years, and virtually all the sellers I've bought from have been lovely people; only a very few who weren't so nice (and Rude Seller is in a class by himself!)
momtoabeautifuldaughter
·5 months agoYou both came across as childish and immature.
Just open an INR case and get your refund
You just had to keep going and have the last word.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoHello, I just found your message, I missed replying to this one. I just came back to this conversation on June 5; life got crazy since March, and I had wanted to wait til after I got my refund, which was completed on April 3, so now here I am. I've gone back to reply to all messages I hadn't before.
First off, I strongly disagree with your message. The way I see it, I was neither childish nor immature in how I handled this unfortunate transaction. His rude, profane and disrespectful tone definitely NEEDED calling out, not just to be ignored and quietly opening an INR case. He had only one other feedback, which was Negative; I added mine as a warning to other buyers. Surprisingly, he did not follow through with his "threat" to leave eBay; he's still here but no further sales since mine. Unlike his messages, I simply presented the facts of the matter (after double checking the listing, to be sure I hadn't missed anything; and yes, I had read it correctly.) I also informed him of eBay messaging rules regarding use of profanity, disrespect, and general vitriol. I absolutely believe speaking up was the right and proper way to handle this. Nothing "childish" about that; on the contrary, I feel I was the adult in the room. Sorry you don't agree, but thank you for your thoughts. I appreciate all the eBayers who posted here.
kibble-net
·5 months agoLadies and gentlemen, this is why if you're a seller, you need to....
Say it with me....
WRITE YOUR OWN TITLES AND DESCRIPTIONS!!!
kennys-kollectibles
·5 months agol agree totally.
I like to refer to Ai as Au. Artificial unintelligence.
fyi, I used to sell vintage magazines, but I would hardly ever bother selling them one at a time.
I used to sell lots of 20 or so, and they fit nicely in a medium priority box.
mamahoney
OP3 months agoThanks for your message! I wanted to wait til my refund was completed on April 3 to return to this conversation, but life got crazy, and I just returned yesterday to reply to all the messages I hadn't already.
Ha ha AI: I've also heard it called Accuracy Intermittent; AU-now that's even better!
Interesting about magazine lots: I have bought quite a few vintage magazines on eBay, mostly singles or small lots. Couldn't afford 20 at once, back then or especially now with skyrocketing prices on everything☹️
bonanza125
·5 months agoThis forum is for asking questions and for advice. Sharing your experience is ok but there really isn't much that can be told to you as you already know. Every buyer and seller come across rude people. It's part of the business. Yes it is the sellers responsibility to accurately describe the listing. Unfortunately this seller should've had individual listing of each magazine they are selling instead of a lot at a buy it now price of what it would cost each. Once they said it was only for one I would have replied "Cancel and refund me." I wouldn't have expected the lot. Yes based on this sellers reaction they don't belong on Ebay. Customer service is apart of transaction they make and if they want to lash out with profanity and hateful language I would report them and hopefully they do what they said and not come back.
mamahoney
OP5 months agoThank you; I know, I wasn't really asking a question; first I looked at others' experiences under Rude Sellers topic. Then I decided to post about mine. When he said in his first message "You do need to know that they are $15 apiece", I was surprised so I double checked the listing. If I had been mistaken, I would have cooperated with him. When I politely laid out the facts to him, his ugly reply and order "not to bother him anymore" needed an answer-still polite but firm (not that I expected to receive any part of my order at that point.) I felt he needed to be told that it is not acceptable to speak to customers that way.
gosimus
·5 months agoBut not exclusively for asking questions and for advice, as the second sentence acknowledges. It should be noted that the button we click to initiate a thread has "Start a conversation" explicitly printed on it. In the past, maybe the link had "Ask a question" on it, but I could be wrong about that . . . at my age, memory was the second thing to go.
tenbigdogs
·5 months agoHi @mamahoney This is one of the Discussion Boards, and you can ask almost anything you want.
As a side to your issue, unless you raise bees, your User ID invites disrespect. If you want respect from others on eBay, you might think about changing it. Good luck!
mamahoney
OP3 months agoSorry it's been so long since I checked replies on this forum; I did get my refund from eBay on April 3.
Um, I'm pretty surprised at your comment on my eBay user name. I've been an active buying eBay member for over 16 years, and never knew my name was inviting disrespect (???) I've had wonderful conversations with sellers I have bought from here, and made some good "eBay friends" with discussions beyond just our transactions. Think I have plenty of respect here, thank you!
So, I will never ever change my name, and here's why: it's a nickname given to me by my youngest son when he was about 5th or 6th grade. He is now nearly 40; he and his lovely wife just had their first baby, (my 6th grandchild.) He still calls me Mamahoney. He picked it up from a video of Fractured Fairytales from the Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoon show, which my sister and I watched in the early 1960s; I was so tickled to find it and share it with my youngest children. Never suspected I would get a sweet nickname from it, too!
grann-4629
·3 months agoThat is so cool @mamahoney that your son still uses your special name. When my son was 2, I named him 'beeper' because he kept running into me with his walker. I still call him that today, and he's turning 50 next July. His friends have no idea of how he earned that nickname!
mamahoney
OP3 months agoHey I just found your message here! Trying to go through them all today. That's so cute about Beeper and how he got his name! If I may, I'd like to tell you how my son (the one who gave me my special name), got HIS nickname still used today by his older sister and me: soon after he learned to walk, he began trotting, then running, always a circuitous route through our big house we had at the time-thru kitchen, family room, enclosed back room (sort of a big indoor back porch), living room and round again. We heard him one day repeating quietly to himself "Gunga, gunga, gunga." No idea where that came from. One day somebody said "Here comes ol' Gunga", we all laughed, and the name stuck! He loves it. He even included it after his given names at his college graduation! Sometimes I call him and his wife Mr and Mrs Gunga. I also called their not-yet-born first baby (now 3 months old) Gunga Jr, but only until they decided on his name.
grann-4629
·3 months agoGreat story ... thanks! This is the main reason I visit these forums ... to hear stories like yours and I often get criticized for going off topic or posting on the wrong forum.
My Grandson used to run around his home the way you described when he was about two. He wanted me to chase him but I was smarter than him ... I went the other way and caught him!
Now, he's smarter than me 😕
ETA: Gunga maybe thought he was making the noise of a train?
christworks
·5 months ago@mamahoney
Both of you look like children in this situation. They were rude, but you also threatened them when you told them you would be coming to this forum. That borders on a threat to name and shame, which violates the very policy you accused the seller of violating.
I cannot judge what is and what is not in the listing, since I can't see it. If the seller thinks "eBay wrote the title," it sounds like they just hit "sell similar" on a listing. This seller seems to have no idea what they are doing. If they truly believe they are only selling one magazine, then of course your "demand" for all of them is going to come across as aggressive. This does not excuse their behavior, but can explain it.
If all of this is over $15, I would ask the seller to cancel and be done with them. Otherwise, the seller could drag this out for weeks by sending you one magazine, forcing you to do a return, etc. It could take you a month or more to get your money back, whereas if you cancel, they will probably take you up on it and you are refunded now. They could still cancel it on their own and lie about the reason, and unless that happens a bunch of times, nothing will happen to their account. So why cause yourself such a headache and reduce your character in the process over $15? Life is too short for this stuff.
mamahoney
OP5 months agoThank you, but I must disagree with your first statement. I don't feel it is a threat to say I would be posting about my experience on this forum, nor does it violate eBay policy, especially since his name is not even shown. I kept my messages polite, but firm, neither "aggressive" nor "demanding". I first double checked the listing in case I had somehow misunderstood, and when I verified I was not mistaken, simply presented him with the facts. After his ugly reply, I felt he needed to be told his behavior was NOT acceptable as an eBay seller. I do not see that as being childish; I see it as being a responsible adult.
I highly doubt the seller would do as you described; in any case, I have already contacted eBay to request a cancellation, and reported the details as to why. They are currently waiting for him to do his part; if he doesn't respond in 3 days, then I can ask them to step in to help with my refund. With shipping, it comes to about $24, not a huge amount, but that's not the point. By the way, in no way do I think this "reduces my character". The way I see it, life is too short NOT to speak up when I should!
soh.maryl
·5 months ago1. YOU, as the buyer, cannot cancel a purchase. You have to request that the seller does so.
But, given your situation, don't give him that satisfaction because if you ask to cancel, he escapes without penalty. If he cancels for any other reason than that you requested it, he gets a defect.
2. Watch the tracking and last estimated delivery date. Once it's one day late and there is no tracking, you, the buyer, can open an item not received case with eBay.
3. Cease ALL communication with that seller.
4. If you are not familiar with it, please read the MBG.
mamahoney
OP5 months agoThank you for your reply and the points you made. I have already contacted eBay to request cancellation. If seller doesn't respond in 3 days, eBay will step in and I will get my refund. I gave details of what he said, and that he refuses to send my purchase, thus there will be no tracking. I will not be contacting seller again. I am familiar with eBay MBG, thanks. Thanks again for your help.